Single Mind

Quero um abraço especial

2010-07-16T20:44:00.005+01:00

Ultimamente os abraços de consolo têm sido alguns. Hoje tive mais um, mas ainda não tive aquele que realmente eu quero.

Como só o papá é que consegue actualizar a página do bebé, aqui fica um abraço a todos os que estão connosco. Não tenho estado muito comunicativa, além do cansaço notório, também não tenho palavras para dizer.

Um abraço e um beijinho a todos,

Mamã

Preciso de ti!

2010-05-18T22:48:00.004+01:00

Olá, eu sou o Lucas.

Sou um menino muito pequenino que gosta muito do papá e da mamã.
Infelizmente, o papá e a mamã tiveram que me levar a uns senhores vestidos de branco. Não achei piada no início, mas agora reparo que todos são muito simpáticos.

Não sei porquê, mas fiquei doentinho. Fiquei numa cama nova no hospital a 18 de Fevereiro (tinha eu 10 meses de idade, nessa altura era um rapaz). Já fiz um ano, agora sou um homico. Desde então fiz 82 hemogramas, às vezes um por dia, outras 2 e 3 por dia. São tantas picas que me dão, tenho muitos doidóis.

Os enfermeiros brincam comigo, quando preciso de uma transfusão de sangue, dizem sempre que vão buscar o meu bife. Nesta história toda, hoje fiz a minha 16ª transfusão.

Eu vinha pedir aos colegas, amigos e familiares da mamã e do papá uma coisa muito dolorosa. Eu sei que dói ser-se picado, mas se forem fortes, podiam dar sangue, assim quando eu precisar tenho sempre algum de reserva.

Não sei quando vou ficar bom, só sei que tenho uma doença com um nome muito esquisito e comprido, tem a ver com anemia hemolítica auto-imune (acho eu!). Todos os dias os meus bonecos tomam o remédio, e eu também.

Mas o mais engraçado do hospital são as máquinas. São giras, têm muitos botões. E quando elas apitam, a mamã faz "chhiu" e dá-lhes uma cacetada. São bem comportadas as máquinas, elas calam-se logo.

Espero por vós (em bife claro).
Beijinhos e muitos sorrisos para todos.

Portuguese critical comments

2009-11-12T20:31:00.004Z

If you know me, you know that I do not like most comments of Portuguese people. I'm not racist, I just don't agree with their mentality.
Click on the title/link above. Read the post related to understand the portuguese comment that I'm posting here.

Ora aqui vai um julgamento à Fafe (ou à fafense), já que falaram nele. Já a minha avó dizia "limpa à tua porta antes de criticares os outros." E ora cá vou eu limpar a m**** da frente da sua porta, sr. Funes (SENHOR ANTÓNIO CARDOSO da CONCEIÇÃO, se é que este é o seu nome verdadeiro).

1º Deveria saber transcrever o que leu. Entre um número e a unidade de medida digita-se sempre um espaço. A unidade de medida (neste caso o quilograma) é SEMPRE em letras minúsculas. Pode sempre consultar um livro sobre as normas internacionais de escrita, que o que lhe estou aqui a ensinar hoje não é nenhuma novidade para alguém que tenha no mínimo a quarta classe.

2º Caso também não saiba, escreve-se Ministério da Educação com letras maiúsculas e... Ministério leva 3 iis.

Pelo seu palavreado, que muitos comentadores ficaram hilariados com o seu discurso, o uso de palavras como tripas revoltas, rebentar os miolos e estrumeira, leva-me a crer que habita no Porto (mas isso não é novidade nenhuma), que deve pertencer ao FCP e que também deve ser um agricultor. Ora como não tenho conhecimento de nenhum latifúndio na cidade do porto, creio que deve cultivar uma pequena horta.

Caro senhor Funes, está na hora de ter mais sorte na vida, porque não se junta ao Grupo da Porto Editora para trabalhar em equipa com eles, e mostrar que sabe fazer melhor do que os matemáticos.

Subscrevo-me como matemática e revisora da revista Polymer Engineering and Science, e mais não lhe digo. Faça o juízo que quiser sobre este comentário, mas lembre-se "temos de varrer a frente da nossa porta, antes de falar dos outros".
Para terminar, como digo sempre, o Português só sabe criticar pela negativa, NUNCA tenta construir nada.

And that's all for today.

Hello People

2009-11-12T20:21:00.003Z

Here I am. :)
I'm fine, I'm a mum as you already know, my little treasure is almost 8 months old.
I'm still a PhD student theoretically, but I do not work at UMinho anymore. The thesis defense should occur before the new year (I hope).

It's quite strange to write a post today, since I'm not writing for more than one year. Honestly I do not have time to maintain this blog active.

Anyway, I'm still around to post some (subtle) comments.

What People Should Not Say

2008-09-23T12:13:00.002+01:00

This last month I’ve eared some unfortunate words. Honestly, I wonder if people have the common sense developed. Here are some words of what I can remember:

(twice from colleagues)

- Was it an accident?!

- Do you think it was an accident with 32 years old? I never had an accident before so why it could be an accident now?!

(from my boss)

- huh, I do not know if I must give you the congratulations.

- You can give them, I don’t mind.

(from a doctor)

- Yes… he can come in, he must be the father right?

I thought: no, no, it’s my neighbor.

(from a colleague)

- And how are you going?

- Fine, but worried with some incontinence when I sneeze, cough, vomit. I must carry clean pants in my purse.

- Oh, so cute.

- I do not see what is cute in this scenario.

- Oh, so it is something serious.

- Not at all, the doctor said this is usual.

(from a colleague)

- You are becoming so fat, so round…

- Thank you. By the way, I’m pregnant.

A Cat Confused

2008-09-05T18:29:00.005+01:00

Usually, when I go to bed (at night or to take a nap), the cat comes with me. He lay down transversally at the bottom of the bed. When I get up, the cat opens one eye, looks at me perhaps thinking “Do not disturb me.”

Yesterday, I went to take a nap, the cat jump to the bed near to my abdomen. I said “go down baby, go down”, but he has not listened me. This time, he was trying to play with something. He put one of his hands on my abdomen, and takes off, put again, takes off. Suddenly, he tried to find something under the sheets, as if some mice could be there. I showed him that nothing was there, and again he put his hand on my abdomen kind of confused.

Today, he jumped to the desk office and began to shuffle a pile of papers near to me… cats are capable of hearing ultrasonic sounds - sounds that are beyond the range audible to humans. No wonder why his so confused, something strange is happening to him.

Desperate Husband

2008-09-02T18:12:00.002+01:00

Today is a very bad day. I woke up with an enormous headache, took already two naps and I’m not feeling better than this morning. I’m trying to entertain myself, to forget the headache. To write a post is always an entertainment.

Last Saturday I went to a wedding celebration. But… before the celebration I should found some adequate clothes. I thought that perhaps my mum could help. Her size is usually the 46EU, so I should fit in. I’ve tried a long skirt but the button was almost 10 cm apart from the place where it should be buttoned. Another long skirt (elastic one) was great but my desperate husband was saying “what a shame!”.

Well, after one hour trying clothes, I’ve taken (short) black pants, but because they will be unbuttoned for obvious reasons, they seemed long pants. Also a large brown tunic was chosen. Well… large for my mother.

I passed all the celebration on the Saturday morning pushing up the pants. Everybody was looking at me, I wonder if they were looking to the clothes or to my belly. Anyway, it was the first time I felt bad in a ceremony. What a disgrace.

Sleeping, Eating and Sleeping

2008-08-11T18:46:00.003+01:00

Last week I’ve spent my time on eating, writing and sleeping. It’s hard when you want to work; you sit in front of the computer, open the text editor and decide to take a nap. Sometimes it is irritating, because you want the work done, but your body/head don’t let you accomplish your task.

Yesterday I’ve decided that by the end of this week I will have chapter 5 and half of the chapter 6 of my thesis written. I’ve started quite well today. I woke up at 9 a.m., eaten by breakfast and 10:30 I was in bed to take a nap. I woke at 13:00 and had my lunch. Miraculously I did a banana pudding instead of tacking a nap.

Did I say tacking a nap? I went to bed to take the second nap at 14:30. Again… I woke up at 18:00 and tasted the pudding. You are wondering when I’ll finish to write the thesis. Well, I do not know. Meanwhile I’m trying to not take another nap. It would be great if I could write the first paragraph of the f***ing fifth chapter.

Online Pregnancy Test

2008-07-11T15:56:00.008+01:00

Science is amazing… Unfortunately is not so amazing as the Internet.

Did you have seen the movie Junior ? Can you believe that a man can be pregnant?! For the male readers: are you sure you are not pregnant?! Take the test.

I’ve done the test twice. First with a male name… surprise, surprise…

Miguel is pregnant, and it is a boy. On the second test I’ve changed the name to Maria. Again, Maria is pregnant but this time is a baby girl.

The website can also predict the baby father! From now on, the human being does not need to buy a pregnancy test. This test is 100% garanteed, all of us are pregant. So do a very happy face because you are going to be a Mommy or Daddy, depending on your point of view.

Sportsmen for Sale

2008-07-08T23:07:00.002+01:00

From junk mail received.

Another Attempt of Robbery

2008-07-02T12:24:00.007+01:00

Did you already have read something about the changes in the Proposta de Revisão dos Regulamentos de Relações Comerciais e Tarifários of ERSE? Check the documents at the bottom of the page, specially this one at page 47.

You can give your opinion until July 7th. I've just sent mine by e-mail.

Approaching a General Crisis

2008-06-14T13:13:00.010+01:00

For those who have bougth a house these past years... beware! Life cost increases, taxes and interest rates increase and wages decrease. The overall perspective about the future does not seems to be promising.

The picture above represents the price of money since 1999 until today (Euribor 3, 6 and 12 months). Let's take a look before 1999 to understand where the increase of the interest rates can go.

My question is very simple: How many people are going to lose their houses? How many people have credits up to 20 or 30 years? And recently, the banks do credits up to 40 and 50 years, which is a crazyness. Such people will pass all their lives working to pay the house. From some calculations here is an example of what people are paying:

[Scrool page down... I can not take off this stupid blank space.] :|

100 000 Euros for # Years at 5% of interest rate
# years	10	20	30	40	50
Montly instalment	1 079.21	668.69	542.10	485.65	456.47
Total payed after # years	129 504.57	160 485.17	195 154.31	233 112.64	273 883.68
Total interest payed	29 504.58	60 485.17	95 154.31	133 112.64	173 883.68
Could buy	medium class car	high class car	small apartment	big apartment	house + terrain
At the end	You suffer, you cry, you don't have money during 10 years, but the future seems promising.	You can pay the college to your children, however this is worst than the instalment.	You are relieved so you can buy a completely brand new small car.	You are old without strength and money to make some improvements to the house.	The descendents inherit an old house which needs major repairs.

Now imagine is someone askes more than 100 thousand Euros!

Good Mixing Degree

2008-06-05T22:37:00.009+01:00

I'm tired of writing... and you say "What?! She's not writing in her blog in about one month." Precisely... My current task is to write papers and the PhD thesis (at least it should be). Honestly, I have not begun writing the thesis. Anyway, I'm not concerned. It will be a compilation of 4 international papers, + introduction, + conclusions. I'll be surprised if the thesis will have more than 100 pages. That's what I call to be concise, which is a mathematician skill or something like the kiss principle.

It's quite discouraging just writing:

Paper 1 (P1) goes to the advisor (A). A returns P1 with comments. P1 goes again to A, and the supreme advisor (SA) asks for P1 and P2. The last corrections on P1 are made by suggestions of A and he asks for P2. P1 goes to SA, while a draft of P2 goes to A.

You get P1 back for modifications and also P2 to re-write, at the same time. (are you following the story?)

P1 goes to SA and P2 to A. P1 still needs some major modifications. P1 goes again to A. P2 return to you and A asks for P3. SA asks for P1.

Well, I'm lost. Basically, today I've sent P1 and P2 to SA and replied to A that P3 will be ready soon referring that "this is what I call a good mixing", i.e., to not know how my work is going on, as if my work subject isn't mixing already. I wonder if soon can be applied to after June 20th.

Also, I now have SA requesting some slides for his presentation at PPS-24. Doing all the calculations, it seems that I have no time available to make my presentation for the same conference, <ironic mode> which is always a good point. </ironic mode>

Do I seem stressed?! I just need to submit the thesis until the end of July and SA says I need 3 months to write the thesis. Fantastic!

Some time ago a colleague has asked: "In a scale of 1 to 20 which is the difficulty of getting a PhD?" I've answered: "4, the difficulty is like in any other job, but you have a lot of work. Also, either you have a lot of perseverance or you'll fail."

I'm mentally tired, exhausted.

Human Evolution

2008-05-02T17:19:00.001+01:00

Negative Minds

2008-04-30T17:21:00.009+01:00

In life, all of us have met or will meet someone who has always an opposite opinion from yours. I mean… If you say yes he/she will say no. If you agree he/she will disagree, and so on. Of course, you do not see or talk with such people everyday. But many times you can denote stubbornness on those people; they just want to be different from you and better than you. Many times those people are just “unbelievable” on invoking ridicules arguments to justify their opinions.

Now, imagine you are making a suggestion or asking something to someone and you got a reply like these ones:

Monday	I do NOT like…
Tuesday	I do NOT want…
Wednesday	I do NOT go…
Thursday	I did NOT knew…
Friday	I did NOT noticed…
Saturday	I did NOT paid attention…
Sunday	I did NOT made…
February 30th	I did NOT saw...

Try to imagine to listen those sentences everyday, even at night in your dreams (That would be a curse). And try to imagine the same person saying those sentences (That would be what?! A hell?!). Some of you are just wondering “Why do you not buy a shotgun?” Humm… what a terrific idea.

Well, a lesson must be taken from this story. We must learn to say NO too, whatever it costs. Let's try to be different and enjoy the negativism of life.

I'm an Editorial Manager

2008-04-18T23:46:00.005+01:00

Many of you know who I am and what is my job. In these last 4 years I have not received any promotion neither a salary raise. To change the scenario I've decided to create my own journal. The first edition was released today... I have distributed the first free edition about 10 minutes ago. Just take a look and have fun!

If you received any specimen like this one under your door, what would be your reaction?

I'll Freeze Tonight

2008-04-07T11:33:00.007+01:00

Traveling is always a problem. We must prepare a suitcase with everything we need during our journey. And even if the journey is only for 24 hours we must prepare it. One of the problems is... the suitcase will be 15% full of its capacity with all your cloths and possessions you want to take with you. The solution could be to put everything in a handbag but... because you have some perfume, cream and toothpaste, you must do the bag check-in. That's the reason to choose a suitcase; otherwise the handbag at the airport arrival will seem a garbage bag.
Another problem is the cloths we must wear, if the weather is completely different from our home country. The weather at this moment is fine:

However, tonight, at my arrival the weather will be not so pleasant.

I can take a coat and hat with me. Everybody at the airport will pay attention at such Eskimo. I could put the coat in the suitcase, right?! In that way I wouldn’t have any problem. But… if the airport lost my suitcase, I would be in a familiar situation: to not have at least clean underpants to change in about 36 hours.

Smoking in enclosed Spaces

2008-03-31T18:23:00.003+01:00

Next time, I'll try to do the same, :p

The Perfect Imperfect

2008-03-06T18:02:00.004Z

Do you remember this movie?! Do you recognize who’s the dancer guy?!

Or… if you prefer this scene of the most famous series in USA:

All the movie scenes can be perfect and eternal however in real life is difficult to keep something eternal. I’ve stepped on a news today… Patrick Swayze is sick. He has a pancreatic cancer. From my research, the pancreatic cancer is one of the fastest killers. From several risk factors smoking represents 75% of the danger "... and the risk persists for at least a decade after quitting."

Do you really want to keep smoking?! Just imagine all the moments you could have if your life was bigger than expected. What's the life time? I do not know, anybody can pass away from one moment to another, but we can always avoid some situations.

Give Me a Break

2008-03-05T11:34:00.002Z

I hate lazy (and stupid) people. Only MOOers will understand this.

He pages, "como e que me teleporto para o scrabblorium?...esqueci-me do numero! :P"

'**** nao sei, vai para o relogio de sala e segue o mapa.

I believe that Biafra is right on changing/removing many of the user permissions.

Feeds

2008-03-04T19:01:00.004Z

I’ve installed the new MSN version (8.5). I was reticent since many people says it is a worthless version. Anyway, I decided to try it. Of course the firewall had not accepted the connection, however I’ve solved the problem. I’ve installed also a mail package… I could have my personal e-mail account there and separately the work account in thunderbird. It was a nice attempt…I still can not download mails from the clix website if I do not have a clix connection.

The advantage is that I can check the feeds there. Yes… the feeds corresponding to your blogs and some other stuff to distract me. The IE was not checking the feeds (a problem that only Microsoft could solve) and Mozilla does not have such ability. So, times to times (ok, averagely one time each 2 months) I took a manual tour to the blogs. Don’t blame me, I do not have so much time as you to be always up to date. Why I’m not using Firefox?! Simple… I’m tired of having the BSOD.

If Windows Live Mail will check the feeds without problems, you can be sure to have some more comments about your writings, i.e., if (and only if) you write something significant. @:-p

Brutish Manners

2008-03-04T18:32:00.002Z

Yesterday, I went to an ATM to update my bank account information. I was the second in line, the girl in front of me took her card and forced the card in the slot. She has performed the bank operation but at the end the machine did not returned the card. She looks to me and said: “The machine has eaten my card. It always happens this to me”. Yeah, I do not want to know how it would be one day, when she will force her baby to eat.

Science with Love

2008-02-28T17:37:00.004Z

Ok, this time is better to show part of my screen. Images speak always by themselves.

I thought on hiding the sender name, but... the message above has his name. At least he has noticed that something was... wrong! From now on, many people (perhaps all the department) will call Mr. Mateus as Francisquinho. :p

Games

2008-02-27T14:31:00.003Z

For who does not have to much work. Have fun. For me, the 28th stage was the hardest.

French Campaign Against AIDS

2008-02-25T22:54:00.002Z

Flash version here

Superwoman

2008-02-23T00:50:00.006Z

This week I’ve found in the Internet an article which describes some of my impotence on changing some facts in my life. You can read it here.

I was raised by my parents. Both have always underlined the fact of being a good housewife. I must have time to cook, to clean (ya… to iron too, blarg), etc, as other women. We can not forget that I work all day (besides the housewife job) and usually I bring extra work that must be done at home. But the problem is the time… time is never enough to do everything.

I already have tried to do a strike for a help on the regular home tasks. But… I can not count with the neighbors; it must be me to do the entire job. I already have requested help to my guy on the weekends. Some few times my request was completely neglected and he says “you need to relax.” Of course… the next hours were passed in bed doing something again and again which makes me falling asleep until 4 p.m. When my mum calls, she’s astonished because I’ve not made lunch and I still sleeping. Oh mum… it’s so hard to explain!

Other times he says “I’ve brougth to much work!” and here I go doing everything alone. But he forgot that I also had brought work. Last weekend he was the most helpful guy. When he wants he is very helpful. Unfortunately I think this is one situation on one thousand.

I’m not complaining… I was raised to be a housewife but… I do not have time for everything. And like me there are thousand of women. If men want their wives smiley with a good mood and time to be in bed, they must help them on everything they can. Do not get surprised if she rejects you or she’s always with a headache.

Tedious Hobby

2008-02-22T23:55:00.001Z

Another weekend… another boring task. I always do a special boring task each Sunday morning. You are wondering what I do, instead of being in bed, delighting a beautiful and peaceful morning thinking about on having some fun after someone’s wake-up.

Indeed, it’s a real psychological torture those mornings. I never liked to stand to much time ironing. Some time ago, I only had a pair of bed sheets, two pants, a pajama and a few shirts for ironing. Today, I really need to have patience for ironing.

Here I am looking to the laundry basket… a towel… a gray shirt… a pants… a gray shirt… a blue shirt… a gray shirt, another grey shirt… a bed sheet, two bed sheets…

Yes… I’ve almost done, finally… my pajama, my pants, my towel… another grey shirt and another and another… all grays. I observe the laundry basket becoming empty, but there is always a f*cking gray shirt there. What a desperately tedious task! No wonder my mother always said “if you like it, buy two but in different colors.” Thanks’ mum, I’ll never forget that.

Google Always in Advance

2008-02-21T17:42:00.003Z

I really don't know how Google manages the advertisements.

Sometimes it seems that I have a female IP, like this time. Check the image below... do you see the pub on the right column?! This is the new Alberto's blog (in Portuguese)

Or... perhaps Alberto is concerned and has made a special @verb for me like he has made in his parrot (#1469). Each time I enter in his room I have the parrot greetings:

Parrot [to natinha] Craah! Ola gostosona!

Ei... I've found a little mistake... Alberto you need to put the two dots (:) after the [to natinha].

Anyway, if someone is concerned about me, do not worry. I know which is my fertile period (and that includes Google too)! :D

Finally... The End!

2008-02-09T20:25:00.000Z

Remember this pearl? Finally, she's gone.

Unfortunately she was smart enough to delete all the data in the computer, but not so smart on thinking that we could not recover the most part of the data. Anyway... Like my advisor has asked: "Do you think you will recover something useful?" Humm, I could not answer that, I always have a little faith on people, believing that perhaps I can be wrong. So I did not said what I really have thought: "No, since she was here doing nothing these last 3 years."

We have exchanged a few words Monday afternoon. She was thankful for my help, bla bla bla... She was trying to be nice (and wise) but I did not play her game. I was very cold and self-assertive. I touched all the points she messed me along these years without a smile. Of course she felt uncomfortable and tried to thank me again and again. She asked what I'll do after the PhD. My answer was very clear... Perhaps a post-doc, but I will only stay in Portugal if they pay me much more than they paid you. What you earn is not enough for me, comparing the knowledge that we each possess. She has shut up with the thanks and said goodbye. Because I’m very polite, I whished her a nice trip.

Instructive Information from my Superiors

2008-02-07T22:36:00.000Z

[FWD]: A complexidade do Papel Higiénico!!!

(C/ perfume) (S/ perfume) (Sensitive c/ vitamina E)

Ao fazer compras no supermercado, fiquei palerma com a linha de papéis higiénicos Neve.

Segundo o fabricante, Neve é um produto sofisticado, destinado às classes A e B... só se for A de Apaneleirado e B de Bicha, pela quantidade de mariquices anunciadas, como o Neve Ultra, que já vem com algumas opções: «alto-relevo de flores, perfume e uma micro-textura» que, segundo o texto da embalagem, proporciona aos seus felizes utilizadores «a suavidade de uma pétala de rosa»!

Perguntar não ofende: alguém já limpou o cu com uma pétala de rosa? Depois, temos o Ultra Soft Color, mais caro é claro! De cor laranja vem com «extracto de pêssego»... como se o cu distinguisse a cor e sentisse o cheiro!

Mas, o supra sumo é o Neve Ultra Protection, o top da linha. Este Rolls Royce dos papéis higiénicos, além de conter «óleo de amêndoas», que garante «maciez superior e um cuidado maior com a pele», na sua delicada fórmula encontramos Vitamina E (!!!)

Esta coisa de cagar e sair com o cu vitaminado é mesmo coisa de maricas!

Manda este mail para os teus amigos de cu sensível... Eu já fiz a minha parte!

E não adianta ficares de trombas porque eu também o recebi!

--------------------

This is what I call "to make science".

Writing e-mails Politely

2008-02-01T15:59:00.000Z

A mail sent from a college teacher to an administrator (X. Lavrador X. with e-mail: lavrador@...) at UMinho:

Exmo Senhor Dr. Lavrador
A secretária do D--- acabou de falar com a sua secretária, ---, que disse que os saldos de 2007 dos centros de custo das propinas de Doutoramento e de outras verbas próprias não iriam transitar para este ano de 2008.
Venho pois solicitar que informe a razão por que tal acontece, com o devido ofício ou nota informativa de quem de direito.
Agradeço ainda que me diga como é que se procederá ao pagamento de viagens e materiais adquiridos para os alunos de doutoramento que pagaram devidamente as suas propinas.
Grata pela informação
-

Sometimes I just love to be around these guys. :-D

Commemorating 10 Years of Economic and Monetary Union!

2008-01-31T16:32:00.000Z

Choose the design of the new euro coin

All euro-area countries will issue a commemorative 2-euro coin with a common design at the beginning of 2009 to celebrate the 10-year anniversary of the launch of EMU and of the creation of the euro.
The design is chosen by EU citizens and residents by voting on the specific web site set up for this purpose. Voting is open between 31 January and 22 February 2008.

The Seed of Bugs

2008-01-31T15:47:00.000Z

Part of the mathematical model developed along these years works with the Monte Carlo method. Did you ever eared talking about stochastic?! Don’t worry… me neither until 3 years ago. Basically, I generate (pseudo-) random numbers, which will dictate what decision to take. The code is written in the C language, and I was compelled to initiate the random numbers, using a seed, well… in this case, the seed is the time.

Yesterday I have made some changes in the code. To verify the results I need to run at least 25*4 simulations, each simulation represents a single point in a graph and takes about 15 minutes to run. So I’ve putted in comment about 90% of the code, in this way I should save some time. Indeed, each simulation is completed in the maximum of 2 minutes, but… there is a big, HUGE problem. The random numbers have not a wide and dispersed range and I can not get the results that I should have. I only get a stagnant line (equal to zero). On the contrary, if I run all the code, which implies higher time consumption, I get the results expected.

Someday I could do some optimization in a way to reduce the computational time (well, I doubt it, but just imagine the scenario), but the question is… would I get the same results?! I don’t think so.

Is there any seed that I could use instead the time?!

Terrorism != Stupidity

2008-01-31T11:44:00.000Z

Who's The Alien?

2008-01-26T22:43:00.000Z

A few days ago, I was coming home after a tired working day when I crossed by an old colleague on the stairs. We met on the master degree classes in October 2002. I’ve finished my degree in June 2004 (I was the first one), the rest of the people should finish their thesis until September 2005.

As I said, I met again an old colleague, and he was a kind of happy or euphoric.

He: Hi, how are you?!

Me: Hi!!! What a surprise… What are you doing here?!

He: I came to talk with the professors. This life is crazy… full of work. I’ve finished a class a few moments ago, and came quickly to have a conversation... – bla bla bla, the guy could not stop talking – and now, at the end, Prof. M wants to be my advisor.

Me: That’s great, perhaps is because you have a nice work. But… are you in a new project?!

He: oh no, no… I’m just finishing my master thesis. And you, how are you going?!

Me: Also full of work, but finishing my PhD thesis.

He: Nice to see you, bye.

Me: Bye.

I feel that one of us must be an alien.

Strange Feeling

2008-01-18T15:50:00.000Z

All of us have good and bad days. Our feelings depend not only on the day H, but also on our mood. We can have a terrible day at work and keeping a good mood. In this moment, my mood is quite “deep”, what I mean is “don’t bother me and I will not … you.” In such days, I really want to stay alone in my corner.

Today I had no patience to have lunch at home. But I did not have lunch with other colleagues, as I said “I would prefer to stay alone”. So I went to the snack-bar, downstairs of this building. To walk the minimum and cross by the minimum number of people, that was my purpose.

At the snack-bar, there was many people, i.e., to many people to feel good with my mood (or myself). Do you know which is the strange feeling of desiring to disappear, to have lunch the fast as you can and return to the office as soon as possible?! I’ve found the place & environment claustrophobic. Today, I wish to go home quickly, as I’ve whished in the boring day’s school, when I was a child.

69: Strange Number for Happiness

2008-01-10T20:50:00.000Z

You're happier than 69 percent of the other people who took Tickle's Happiness Test.

The Happiness Test

My Result: Personal Growth

As you now know, your personal growth a positive effect on your overall happiness. Commitment to personal growth is a dedication to being the best that you can be. When you're empowered by personal growth, you tend to view your life as a glorious work in progress. You're also likely to put effort toward exploring what life has to offer you because you have strong sense of purpose that acts as your guide. This faith and focus helps you feel capable that you can change things for the better.

Being actively directed toward exploring your place in the world is where your happiness springs from most. It's also the place where your happiness gains the most power and stability. Because this personal growth appears to be the natural anchor point for your happiness, know that you can always tap into this aspect of yourself when times get rough.

There is real power in being committed to personal growth. Focusing yourself this way allows you to steadily improve your life and tackle any obstacles that might appear in your path. It also helps you feel a greater sense of control in your relationships and the world around you. Through personal growth, you can nurture your spirit and build personal resources including willpower, strength, and focus. These can be valuable assets to draw upon in less happy times.

Take this test >

Sharing

2008-01-10T18:27:00.000Z

When I was coming home, I’ve listened a few word of a conversation between 2 ungrad students:

Guy 1: I have a uncle who is a priest at Algarve, and he never gave me anything in all my fucking life.

Guy 2: yeah… and Bible says to share everything.

What the fucking minds are these ones?! Just because in the Holy Bible it is written that we must share with others, the believers in Christ must work and support these guys?! Come on… leave college and get a real job.

A Happy End :)

2008-01-10T18:25:00.000Z

I always have been a little rushed on some kind of things. I've not waited 2 days to do a cut on my finger. In the same day I’ve done the cut myself. Meanwhile, the intensity of pain has decreased and I do not think that it is necessary to remove the nail. Honestly, I think that tomorrow it will be as if I did not had any problem on my little head finger.

Sometimes, we need to be our own doctors.

Alone, Busy and Desperate

2008-01-08T16:43:00.000Z

Remember the Murphy’s Law? Last night I didn’t sleep a minute. I had so many pains on my finger, it was like if it was exploding and still like it. By the early morning I went to the doctor. Thanks’ God… he has prescribed some antibiotic. But… perhaps in two days it will be necessary to make a cut on the finger to clean the region or in the worst case, to remove the nail.

So, I went to the chemistry to buy the medicine:

me: This one is the antibiotic, right?!

lady: Yes, you must take one each 8 hours… and this one is for the diarrhea.

me: I’m sorry?!

lady: For the diarrhea.

me: Yes, I’ve understood… but I do not have diarrhea!!

lady: Perhaps the doctor has miswritten the medicine.

me: Can you check for me the secondary effects?

lady: Oh God, this antibiotic will cause gastro-intestinal disturbances.

Great… now to stop the pains on the finger I’ll have pains on the ass.

Alone and Busy

2008-01-08T02:34:00.000Z

It is almost 2:30 a.m. and I’m still working… yah, writing papers, it’s amazing. The bad part is my third finger on the right hand. YES, precisely that one. Today is the fourth day that I’ve a huge paronychia. It has started at the nail groove and at the moment my finger seems a round red candy with a stick. It’s a real shit to write on the computer without this finger.
Tomorrow (or today) if someone messes me I can always complain about my luck and show my finger in this position .|. :p

Opinions

2007-12-28T23:25:00.000Z

It is always fun to ear people analyzing or criticizing ourselves. I wonder why I laugh every time someone does that with me.

A co-worker:

“Usually I knock before opening her office’s door. She doesn’t move her head but only the eyes, and looks above her glasses. If it is someone of her interest, she moves her head, says hello and talks friendly, otherwise her eyes are redirected to the laptop, ignoring who has knocked the door.”

At home, I have analyzers too:

“When you phone your father you use the French accent, when calling your mom you have the typical north accent.”

Or… asking something like “So, how is living with me? Do you like it?”:

“Well, it is an adventure… mainly when your parents are coming to visit you. You enter through that door like a hurricane.”

Sweet Love

2007-12-23T15:58:00.000Z

Every woman likes to have breakfast in bed. The romantic and perfect scene is to see our love coming from the kitchen with a tray by the morning. I had a beautiful wake up yesterday… I’ve sit up on the bed to hold the tray.

me: Oh two cups… are you going to take your breakfast on the bed too?!

he: Yes, my dear. And I do not have any rose, otherwise I’d give you one.

me: And is all these bread (round balls of bread) with cheese for you?!

he: These two are for you, the other one with melted cheese is for me. I didn’t put yours in the microwave, because I know you do not like melted cheese.

I took the plate with the bread and I’ve knocked the bread:

me: And do you think I like to eat boulders?! This bread is 5 days old.

he: In fact, this could kill someone.

Another [M]nat[h]'s Theory

2007-12-13T18:10:00.000Z

On the phone, when you are hanging on, listening some classical music during several minutes... The time of waiting is proporcional to the necessity to go to bathroom.

[M]nat[h] Theory

2007-12-13T10:22:00.000Z

The number of times that we check on-line the bank accounts is inversely proportional to the capital amount available on them.

Murphy's Law

2007-12-07T20:49:00.001Z

How many of these laws are not applied to you?

When you have to unlock a door and you have your hands full with 10 big, heavy bags…the key will be placed in the opposite pocket from the hand you hardly managed to free.
The only time when the door closes by itself is when you left the keys inside.
When your hands are full of soil, your nose begins to tickle.
When you have the impression that everything is going very well…it’s because you missed something important…
When you manage to stay calm when everyone near you is desperate… it’s because you didn’t get the entire gravity of the problem.
Problems are not created, neither solved, they just transform!
You’ll get to the phone running exactly in time to hear that the other one hangs up.
There are always two good movies on two different channels on TV…but always at the same time.
The probability to drop food on yourself during lunch is directly proportional with the necessity of keeping your clothes clean!
Any human body, sink in a foamy, relaxing bath…makes the phone ring!
Any human body, sit on a toilet, makes the door bell ring!
Wind’s speed increases directly proportional with the price of the hairdressing recently made.
If you decide, after many years, to throw away something you haven’t used for a long time…Not more than 3 days will pass until you’ll desperately need exactly that object!
Always, when you get somewhere in time, no one will be there to notice that, but when you are late with only 5 minutes…everyone will be already there…and everyone will look at their watch and then look at you!
Don’t take life serious, after all, you won’t survive it!
If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong.
If there is a worse time for something to go wrong, it will happen then.
If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which a procedure can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly develop.
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.
Whenever you set out to do something, something else must be done first.
Every solution breeds new problems.
Enough research will tend to support your theory.
When there is a very long road upon which there is a one-way bridge placed at random, and there are only two cars on that road, it follows that: (1) the two cars are going in opposite directions, and (2) they will always meet at the bridge.
Smile... tomorrow will be worse.
Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
You never run out of things that can go wrong.
No battle plan ever survives contact with the enemy.
If your advance is going well, you are walking into an ambush.
The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.
If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization.
An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less until he knows absolutely everything about nothing.
All's well that ends.
A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.

Cats

2007-12-07T17:29:00.000Z

A Brazilian colleague went to my house 2 days ago. She was amazed with the cat... humm... the big, big cat. At a first glance she thought it was a dog. Yesterday, the first thing she said when I've entered the office was: "How is the little cute baby?!".Today I've showed her how is to be a owner of a cat, e.g., on the Saturdays by the early morning, we could sleep more time than in the work days, but...

By the way, look at this acrobatic cat. Amazing!!

Effort 0%

2007-11-29T20:30:00.001Z

I wonder why people are so sloppy.

This morning, at 7 a.m., I had no hot water (no natural gas in the tubes) to take a bath. I’ve looked to the gas bill and realized that I only could call after 8 a.m. to advertise the gas company. I’ve waked up at 9:30 and I still had any gas pressure. I’ve called to the emergency number and surprise, surprise… nobody had called by that time. The technicians have phoned me one hour later, saying that all the building had no natural gas, but at the moment they had fixed the problem.

Does this means that nobody in this building takes baths with hot water, or that nobody heats the milk for the breakfast?! Or does this means that nobody cares about, thinking that someone will call to the company later?!

Beijing 2008 Olympic Games - Aug. 08-24 2008

2007-11-23T16:48:00.000Z

Have a Nice Weekend

2007-11-23T16:36:00.001Z

Trick or Treat

2007-11-22T19:19:00.000Z

Do you like this picture?!

I like the picture and someone told me "It would be nice if such place exists."

Oh well, I've bought the picture, i.e., the puzzle. Now, someone needs to complete it before to move its computer to my desk. The puzzle will be on the top of the desk to protect it. The puzzle only measures 1.21m x 0.8m, it covers the desk on wide but not on length. Aah, but I have already done 3 puzzles for that purpose.

I hope he will complete the task as soon as possible. In fact, it was his Christmas gift - plus a Christmas calendar with chocolates and a Santa Claus Chocolate :). I hope the cat does not hide any piece under the furniture.

Haloween already passed but I've gave chocolates and a big headeach to solve. I really hope he doesn't become crazy with 3000 pieces.

Old Days

2007-11-16T18:23:00.000Z

Can you imagine the picture where a man is seated on a sofa watching TV, and his woman in the kitchen washing the dishes?! Ok, now imagine the guy screaming “Honey bring me another beer, please.”

Last weekend I was seated on a chair in the kitchen (drinking a martini) and my boy was washing the dishes. He is so sweet on helping me. Unfortunately I do not have any sofas yet, but it would be fun one day if I'll say “Honey bring me another martini, please”.

Men are saying “The good old days are gone!”

Mr. Vain (Reload)

2007-11-16T18:11:00.000Z

Do you remember Mr. Vain?! He is soooo big, last month he had 4.4Kg of weight. His bathroom was located at the veranda, but 2 weeks ago I’ve moved it to the laundry. I can not have the window of the living room opened all the time, since the temperature is decreasing.

Mr. Vain was always happy after a bathroom session, I mean… after shitting, he always ran inside the living room happy. I always thought the cat felt good after relieving itself.

He continues doing that. He jumps outside his basin and runs out passing by the kitchen reaching the other extremity of the house, i.e., the living room.

Unfortunately, I’ve realized why he always runs after shitting. One day I was in the kitchen making the dinner and I was forced to leave the kitchen with the smell coming from the laundry. One of these last days, he was in the basin and I said to my boyfriend “Prepare yourself for the fragrance that is coming!” The cat passed along the kitchen running, I’ve taken a deep breath and he said “I don’t smell anything!” After 10 second he changed his mind and said “What a shit, the cat his really a cagones!” So, what’s new?! :-D

ZOOMinho

2007-11-08T16:43:00.000Z

In these last 5 years I’ve been working at the university. In all this time I’ve been in three different offices. When looking back I do not miss those places. They were not bad at all, but in this office the silence is the characteristic which I most appreciate.

From today on, I do not want to go back to those offices. I have a strong and valid reason for that. Well apart some occasional fleas in this office, the other ones at this moment are being inhabited by rats.

Definitively, we are in a new generation: the recycling generation. The rats are helping on destroying plastic and creating some faeces. How nature is wonderful… Like Einstein said “we can just transform mass into energy and energy into mass”. However it is common in these days to have organic and non-organic products/mass. The rats are transforming non-organic on organic mass by a biological process. And as you know all the biological products are expensive.

On an economical point of view, the price of the biological product will suffer a raise, since a new biological method has been applied on transforming the inorganic mass. After a few calculations on your budget, you will say “Damn the rats”.

Oh no… the Chinese is back!

2007-11-05T16:48:00.000Z

In these last 2 years I had a Chinese colleague in the office. Unfortunately, I do not have the best opinion about her. She came here for a pos-doc, but she didn’t know the C language and how to create a .doc file. My name became so common on requesting help that I can not support to look at her. (And she is just in front of me).

Last July she went to China for holidays. Here at the office everybody was glad, at least we will pass 2 months without the bad smelling. Fortunately she has needed to stay 2 months more there. And we were happy… and thinking that perhaps she could not return anymore.

I’ve helped so much that woman that someday she has decided to return to me all the favors. She has introduced to me a Japanese guy (pos-doc), saying that he was single, a nice man and had only 31 years old. The same guy, after 5 minutes of acquaintance, makes me the proposal to go to Lisbon to a Japanese party on the next weekend.

Point 1: What the fuck would I do between Japanese people?!

Point 2: I do not have extra money!

Point 3: Where the fuck would I sleep?!

Of course, I have rejected the proposal with a huge smile. I’ve entered in the office and passed hours arguing with her. I even told her “If you think he is a nice guy, go to bed with him!” She only asked excuses saying “You are always so nice with me; I was trying to help you on finding a husband.” Great… that was the biggest certificate of inability that I have received on all my life.

Another day, she said that was bitten by a bug. She thought on going to the doctor, so he could give her some medicine to kill the bugs. Well… they were jumpy bugs on the bed. Jumpy bugs?! I’ve made a search on google for flea. I’ve found some images and showed to her. She said very happy “that’s it, they are the same. How can I kill them?” My answer was short “clean the house, wash the laundry and take a bath.”

Yes, yes, yes… I’ve told her a lot of times to take a bath. She smells so badly. Once she has asked where the bad smell was coming. I didn’t know what to say and with some nerves I told “I don’t know, take a bath. Perhaps it’s your feet, perhaps it’s your hair or perhaps it’s between your legs!” She was shocked and asked me “Are you telling me that I have a sex problem?!” I’ve laugh and laugh, I could not say anything.

And today she is back. What the fuck!

Portuguese People are the Most Distrustful and Less Civic People of Europe

2007-10-25T10:42:00.000+01:00

Just click on the title to read the fresh on-line news from RTP.

I'm not surprised. Unfortunatly not everybody will read the news. People should be ashamed to be like this.

Time Loop

2007-10-22T12:43:00.000+01:00

Yesterday in the early morning a familiar noise has woke me up. I was listening someone walking and my mind associated to the footsteps of my mother coming up by the stairs. I’ve thought “Oh no, mum is coming to wake me up”.

[When I lived with my parents, my mother had always the bad habit to come to wake me up in a very friendly way. She opened my bedroom door, opened the blind and pulled out the bed sheets in a way that all my body was uncover, saying “It’s time to wake up” very loud. On the week days it was at 7 a.m. and on the weekend at 8:30 a.m.]

I’ve opened my eyes suddenly and kept listening the footsteps. I’ve eared someone breathing behind me. Wow, who was there?! My mother would kill me. I’ve turned the head and realized that I was in my house and not having 12 years old. What a relief!!

The footsteps were exaggerated. The upper neighbor was walking with high-heeled shoes at 6 a.m.. Surprisingly, some tears have rolled into my face. I wonder why.

Thinking Twice

2007-10-17T18:25:00.000+01:00

My mother has taught me to cook, since my earlier years. She always used bouillons when cooking some food. And it’s great.

One day, I was cooking for friends, and one of them saw that I’ve putted a bouillon in the pan, her comment was hilarious:

- Only bad cookers use bouillons. I prefer natural food. – And she has not eaten anything at lunch.

She has tried to teach me to cook without it, but… to be honest… the food taste was not the same. She prefers to use spices rather to use bouillons, however not all spices can be eaten by everybody.

The funny story is that if someone does something in a different way than we do, this means that we are not good or not capable to do better than them. If we look for the big picture, this happens everywhere at all the time. Why people can not admit that there are several ways to do something and why people does not recognize that their ways are not always the best?!

Just think about it… how many times you point the finger to someone without thinking twice?!

Dedication to MOOsaico's People

2007-10-12T16:53:00.000+01:00

Look Here

2007-10-10T20:18:00.001+01:00

Take a look at my body, look at my hands, there's so much here that I don't understand.

Your face saving promises, whispered like prayers.. I don't need them.

Cuz I've been treated so wrong, I've been treated so long as if I'm becoming untouchable...

Well, contempt loves the silence it thrives in the dark, the fine winding tendrils that strangle the heart.

They say that promises sweeten the blow but I don't need them... no I don't need them.

I've been treated so wrong, I've been treated so long as if I'm becoming untouchable.

I'm a slow dying flower, in the frost killing hour sweet turning sour, & untouchable....

Oooh I need the darkness, the sweetness, the sadness, the weakness, ooh I need this.

Need a lullaby, a kiss goodnight, angel, sweet love of my life! ooh I need this..!

I'm a slow dying flower, frost killing hour, the sweet turning sour, & untouchable...

Do you remember the way that you touched me before, all the trembling sweetness I loved and adored...

Your face saving promises whispered like prayers. I don't need them....

I need the darkness, the sweetness, the sadness, the weakness, ooh I need this.....

I need a lullaby, a kiss goodnight, angel, sweet love of my life... ooh I need this..

Well, is it dark enough, can you see me? do you want me? can you reach me? or I'm leaving...

You better shut your mouth and hold your breath you kiss me now, you catch your death...

Ohhh I mean this, Ohhh I mean this...

My skin - Nathalie Merchant

Recycling

2007-10-10T18:57:00.000+01:00

When I was in college, several times I had some discussions about recycling, i.e.., in which rubbish bin we should put some wastes. For example, where we should put the empty milk pack?

I remember someone saying “it’s made of paper, so it goes on the blue container.” And I’ve replied “but it has some aluminum inside!” Oh well, everybody voted for the blue, so these last 10 years I have been putting the milk packs on the blue bin.

A few days ago, I was eating my breakfast when I saw on the milk pack the instruction for recycling… we should put it on the yellow bin. I’ve checked other packs (juice packs) and it is also marked with the yellow bin.

Oops… :-) It’s not my fault.

Grape Harvest

2007-10-01T20:44:00.000+01:00

This last weekend I’ve made a visit to my mother. We were having lunch when I’ve asked her:

me: Next weekend to you need extra-help for the grape harvest?

mom: Are you thinking on what I am thinking?!

me: Yes, why not?! You both already know each other…

mom: But… he doesn’t mind coming from F., do he?!

me: I didn’t say that was the guy from F.

mom: NO!!

me: Yes.

mom: NO, I can not believe on it.

me: Well, it’s true, you can believe it.

mom: I told you that someday you will join together again.

me: Ok, don’t tell me anything more. I already know your opinion.

mom: And what’s happened to the other guy?!

me: Mom, in my life the buses were always late, and I’ve always waited for them. This time I’ve decided to take another bus from a different line. I hate to be late.

Well, that’s true. Again 2 Aries have joined together for the third time. Yes… third time, unbelievable, hein?! So here are the dates which I remember quite well:

May 15th, 1997

January 19th, 2002

September 4th, 2007

Each 5 years we join together, so I’m already prepared to split away in order to join together again in 2012. :-) In this moment you are wondering why we spilt away. As I said to him, some weeks ago “90% of the reasons are from gastronomical incompatibilities”. I’m hearing your laughs :-) I think that if everybody had only gastronomical incompatibilities the world would be happier, right?! But in our case… the Aries tend to be perfectionists and if something doesn’t match the relationship doesn’t hold on for long. Anyway 10 years have already passed, and both are more tolerant, or at least we should be more tolerant. Huumm, making a quick introspection, I think I’m less tolerant than I was 10 years ago, but at least I’ve more wisdom to deal with the misunderstandings/problems.

Make your bets… are we going to join together a 4th time?!

Time – Pink Floyd

Caught Red-Handed

2007-10-01T11:11:00.000+01:00

Today, I’ve used a fragrance that was given by Nadya, a Bulgarian co-worker. It smells like roses. Well, it is a kind of rose’s oil and not perfume. Angel (another Bulgarian co-worker) enters in the office and asks: “Are you using any Bulgarian perfume?”

What You See Is Not What It Seems

2007-09-28T15:45:00.000+01:00

A Far West Story

2007-09-26T17:29:00.000+01:00

Today I’ll tell another story… a story full of stupidity (or should I say macho stupidity?!)

The story began in November 2005. I was in USA, when one day I’ve called mum. I’ve denoted a strange voice and I’ve insisted on knew what’s going on. Mum told me “A bastard has stolen the plot of land, sliced by the road.” Just to explain, we have one hectare of land. In August 2005 we let a road passing along it to benefit and raise the value of it. In fact, in a corner, the road has sliced the field. About 100m^2 were separated from the big amount of land. Well, it is nothing, but if someday I decide to divide the hectare into lots, that 100m^2 of land can give a small parking car. In fact, next to the slice of land is passing by a brook. The neighbor in the other side of the brook has decided to make 2 bridges connecting his two small farms with the road. Of course, he has passed over the sliced field, knocking down the trees remained there for decades.

I’ve asked to mum why she didn’t stop the guy but she has replied to me that the guy said in the presence of the police officers “Move away or I’ll pass the digger over you.”

I was so far away, and so pissed off. I really doubt that the guy would make any bridge if my father or I was there. The bastard has stolen land from us, threaten my mother and… continuing with the story…

I told to mum to talk with a lawyer and to prosecute the bastard for a) robbery; b) property invasion; c) property damages; d) threat to her physical integrity. She is stubborn, but this time she has made everything as I was telling her. My father was pissed off too. He does not tolerate such disrespect to his wife. My father is crazy enough to do something foolish, so it was not easy to calm him down.

August 2006 I’ve decided which flat to buy. One day, I was so tired that I went to bed in the afternoon. It was 17.30 when I've received a phone call from mum, completely desperate saying “I need your help, come here quickly. The bastard has attempted to kill your father.” Ok, then I was really, really pissed off. You do not want to know what I was intending to do in the next 10 minutes after the phone call. I went there. At my arrival the police officers were there making measurements and asking some questions to the witnesses. So what’s happened?! My parents went to the farm and in that specific moment the bastard was in his farm. My father went until the bridge and remained on his side. He was intending to have a serious talk, man to man, with the bastard. The bastard enters on his pick-up, passes over the bridge in direction to my father. My father had time only to jump to the brook, but not without a push from the pick-up on his backs. From the police officers measurements, the pick-up was in the opposite sense of the road and passed with the front tire from the bridge side about 10 cm. Later he said to the police officer that it was not his intension to run over my father.

I went with my father to the emergency and remained there for several hours. He had a fissure on his low spine. In the emergency service everybody was astonished with such story. One of the doctors said “Are we in the far west land, or what?!” It was 2 a.m. when I went to the police office with my father to prosecute the bastard for e) killing attempt. I remember my father was tired and confused. My father has answered all the questions made by the police officer, but it was me that I was insisting on prosecute the guy. The police officer was always saying “This is a disagreement between neighbors, the case will be closed”. After 2 hours of nonsense conversation I become angry and said “You will accept our charge and gladly, otherwise tomorrow morning I’ll be here to talk with your superiors. As you have told, you should be at home with your wife and your kids since about 2 hours ago. So if you really love them, you will not take the risk to be dismissed or to be regressed.” End of the story, the guy has made the prosecution, my father has signed the papers and we went home to rest. This story is so serious that PJ (Policia Judiciária) is in charge for the case.

This week my mum said “The bastard is demolishing the bridges”, finally after 2 years, but today she told me “He has only destroyed one; tomorrow I’ll go to the town council to charge him again.” All of us are beginning to see some light at the end of the tunnel... Two f*cking years to compel the bastard to demolish the bridges!! Now, we just need to sit down and watch the decay of the bastard, on paying the court costs and the compensations for all the prosecutions, specially the prosecution e).

By the way, today (September, 26) my parents celebrate their 37th marriage anniversary. Congratulation to both of them.

Decisions

2007-09-17T17:27:00.000+01:00

Once someone said to me: I always avoid to take decisions, usually I let life going on. Things get always a pathway without I interfere.

Each step of my life was carefully taken and decided, in which direction I should move. I need to recognize that if I didn't took any decision along my life, I would not be what I am neither I would be writing this message. There are some easy decisions but for some of them we feel anguish, sadness and despair. We try to imagine the left path and it is doesn’t seems pleasant. So we try to imagine the right path and it seems worst. In fact, we can not run away from taking decisions. I wonder what kind of life has the people that are so easy-going.

The f*cking decision, as I have described it in the last post, was already taken. I’m not sure that’s the best one, but at least I can not be censored to be strict. Anyway, if it is the right decision I just have to wait for the profits. Meanwhile I’m seeing some hurricanes approaching. I’ll try to minimize the damages with a smooth breeze coming from my mind and heart.

Coincidences

2007-09-14T09:56:00.000+01:00

There are so many coincidences in this world. I've passed almost all the night awake thinking, thinking and re-thinking. As much we think on something less we can understand ourselves. This morning I came to work and I had the following song to listen on one of my feed. I've got the music and I'm listening it repeatedly since about 1 hour ago.

The lyric is below and describes exactly my mood for the next days, until I find the f*cking answer.

In The Shadows - The Rasmus

No sleep,
No sleep, until I'm done with finding the answer
Won't stop,
Won't stop, before I find the cure for this cancer
Sometimes, I feel like going down I'm so disconnected
Somehow, I know that I am haunted to be wanted
I've been watching, I've been waiting
In the shadows for my time
I've been searching, I've been living
For tomorrows all my life
In the shadows
in the shadows
They say, that I must learn to kill before I can feel safe
But I, I'd rather kill myself than turn into their slave
Sometimes, I feel that I should go and play with the thunder
Somehow, I just don't wanna stay and wait for a wonder
I've been watching, I've been waiting
In the shadows for my time
I've been searching, I've been living
For tomorrows all my life
Lately, I've been walking, walking in circles
Watching, waiting for something
Feel me, touch me, heal me
Come take me higher
I've been watching, I've been waiting
In the shadows for my time
I've been searching, I've been living
For tomorrows all my life
I've been watching
I've been waiting
I've been searching
I've been living for tomorrows
In the shadows
In the shadows
I've been waiting

Changing

2007-09-13T21:06:00.000+01:00

By changing your thinking,
You change your beliefs;

When you change your beliefs,
You change your expectations;

When you change your expectations,
You change your attitude;

When you change your attitude,
You change your behavior;

When you change your behavior,
You change your performance;

When you change your performance;
You change your life!

Thanks to Jean Louis

Quase

2007-09-12T17:49:00.000+01:00

Ainda pior que a convicção do não,
É a incerteza do talvez,
É a desilusão de um quase!

É o quase que me incomoda,
Que me entristece,
Que me mata trazendo tudo que poderia ter sido e não foi.

Quem quase ganhou ainda joga,
Quem quase passou ainda estuda,
Quem quase amou não amou.

Basta pensar nas oportunidades que escaparam pelos dedos,
Nas chances que se perdem por medo,
Nas idéias que nunca sairão do papel por essa maldita mania de viver no outono.

Pergunto-me, às vezes, o que nos leva a escolher uma vida morna.
A resposta eu sei de cor.

Está estampada na distância e na frieza dos sorrisos,
Na frouxidão dos abraços,
Na indiferença dos "bom dia", quase que sussurrados.

Sobra covardia e falta coragem até para ser feliz.

A paixão queima,
O amor enlouquece,
O desejo trai.

Talvez esses fossem bons motivos para decidir entre a alegria e a dor.
Mas não são.

Se a virtude estivesse mesmo no meio-termo,
O mar não teria ondas,
Os dias seriam nublados e o arco-íris em tons de cinza.

O nada não ilumina,
Não inspira,
Não aflige nem acalma,
Apenas amplia o vazio que cada um traz dentro de si.

Preferir a derrota prévia à dúvida da vitória é desperdiçar a oportunidade de merecer.

Para os erros há perdão,
Para os fracassos, chance,
Para os amores impossíveis, tempo.

De nada adianta cercar um coração vazio ou economizar alma.
Um romance cujo fim é instantâneo ou indolor não é romance.

Não deixe que a saudade sufoque,
que a rotina acomode,
que o medo impeça de tentar.

Desconfie do destino e acredite em você.
Gaste mais horas realizando que sonhando...
Fazendo que planejando...
Vivendo que esperando...

Porque, embora quem quase morre esteja vivo,
Quem quase vive já morreu.

Thanks to Cecília Mendonça.

Kissing

2007-09-10T21:06:00.000+01:00

Men do not know how to give a magnificent kiss:

Sometimes we need to teach them:

Playlist

2007-09-06T16:37:00.000+01:00

There is always something not working in our lives. Today I woke up with good will for work but... my computer had some trojans and spywares, so I didn't made anything useful today. And I don't think I'll do until the end of the day :-s Yes... I'm bored.

Since a few months I have included some peculiar musics on my playlist. Stay with some of them. Enjoy :) Aaah, if you beg I can give you some. :)

Giannis Ploutarxos: H Aftokatastrofi Soy

Stamatis Gonidis: Exo Petaksi Mazi Sou

Despina Vandi: Sta Dosa Ola

Old Passions

2007-09-05T19:38:00.000+01:00

To be honest I took this picture from another friend. This remembers me something (recent or not!), the affection, the safety, the passion that stick two people together.

I've replied the picture to a very old friend (ok, ex-boyfriend) and I've got a huge smile and a felted comment. Some weeks ago he made me a curious question: "Do you already have thought how it would be if we rebuilt the relationship?!" I laughed, I knew someday he would ask it. He knows the detailed answer and I'll not publish it here. But I have a question for him: "If you tell me that I'm too much exigent for you, how can you think on rebuilding a relationship?!"

This guy was the only one that has respected me in all senses during all over the relationship. It's difficult to find decent people around and hard to stick together two Aries. Mathematically I can deduce that only Aries people are decent. :)

The Guns of Navarone

2007-09-04T16:55:00.000+01:00

Last Saturday I've watched a movie of 1961: The Guns of Navarone. The lesson to be learned it would be "if a group sticks together, then the group wins the battle". However 2 scenes were curious or fascinating.

1st scene: Cpl. Miller to Cap. Mallory, "I've never killed a woman, damn it. Why you do not pull the trigger? Make the difference and show all of us what you are."
Capt. Mallory points his gun to Anna and suddenly it is Maria who pulls the trigger killing Anna.

1st question: Who is guilty?! Is the guy who have told to pull the trigger or the other one who pulled it?!

2nd scene: Capt. Mallory says to Maj. Franklin who had a broken leg since 2 or 3 days ago, "Tonight at 10 p.m. our troops will come rescue us." He was intending that under torture Maj. Franklin would transmit to he German army such information, in a way to open a secure path until the entrance of the mountain where the guns of Navarone were located.

2nd question: Why the human being is so week in spirit when physically fragile/ill?!

The Guns of Navarone - Trailer

The two questions above are kind of rhetorical questions. All of us at least one time in our life thought about these subjects: guilty and fragility.

Comment from a friend: "There are too much scenes where nobody says anything." Huum I wonder what he would say if we were watching a pornographic movie.

Technology

2007-09-03T15:17:00.000+01:00

In these days everybody is ruled by a schedule. If someone does not have one, we figure out that it has a chaotic life. Each day we need a timetable with almost everything we need to do since the earlier morning until the evening. Each activity must be planed otherwise it will never be accomplished.

I can not say that I follow a rigorous schedule, I’m not so meticulous, but… I like to know what I can expect in a close or far future. I’m really mad when someone enters in the office and says “I need your help and it must be now” or when mom phones 5 minutes before lunch and says “Hi darling, come to my house and have lunch with me”. Wrong, wrong, wrong… My mother already knows that she must alert me in advance about 24h. But other people just do not learn to be… to be what?! Polite?!!

It is like if everybody is expecting that I should be available for everything at the sound of a finger pop. Most of the people never advise what they want, what they are thinking or what they want from me. Most of the times I need to guess… well if I was so good guesser perhaps I’d already win the lottery.

In these days, people have so much technology and they do not know how to use it. There are phones, faxes, internet, etc to communicate, they use them but improperly. Some decades before, there were no phones, neither faxes nor internet and everybody was happy with an organized life. Today… it’s a mess.

When people want something it must be in the exact moment, but if people need to have a serious conversation, then they will write an e-mail. And this happens everywhere almost everyday with almost everybody.

The curious part is if you reply to someone pointing your disapproval on this issue, you will be called of ridiculous, intolerant and fool. So I can say that we live in a world where our lives are driven by the wishes of people that surround us. Our needs are completely meaningless.

In my honest opinion, people are not prepared to use so much advanced technology.

Waiting for Tomorrow

2007-08-31T18:52:00.000+01:00

More than missing you is getting crazy!

Will You Love Me Tomorrow - Bryan Ferry

Tonight you´re mine completely
You give your love so sweetly
Tonight the light of love is in your eyes
Will you love me tomorrow?
Is this a lasting treasure
Or just a moments pleasure
Can I believe the magic of your sighs
Will you still love me tomorrow?
Tonight with words unspoken
You say that i´m the only one
But will my heart be broken
When the night meets the mornin´ sun
I´d like to know that your love
Is love I can be sure of
So tell me now and I won´t ask again
Will you still love me tomorrow?
So tell me now and I won´t ask again
Will you still love me tomorrow?
Will you still love me tomorrow?

Real Music: Whismaster - Nigthwish

2007-08-28T23:18:00.000+01:00

Today I cried

2007-08-28T20:35:00.000+01:00

Since my 15 years old that I have (or had) a health problem. I’ve got used and lived with it until today. On each year passing the quality of life had always an exponential decrease. Soon I had a restricted diet, but you know better than nobody that sometimes we break the diet. It’s not easy to go to a restaurant and do not know what to eat. I’ve always avoid the weird names on the menu and sometimes I asked to the waiter which specific condiments the food had.

There was times that I didn’t knew that I will got ill. I remember the day I’ve started the master degree. My mother has made a delicious soup with white beans for diner. White beans… Today I run away from them as the devil runs away from the cross. Another memorable day, a MOO dinner (the last dinner, not lunch), while socializing I’ve drunk a vodka. Vodka… I’ve passed around 10 hours in the hospital in the next day. While attending the SofExtrusion 2004 at Algarve, I’ve drunk some red wine while I was dinning with my boss. We were in the Pestana Hotel (5 *) at Alvor. 5 days of conference it was like 5 days of nightmares. In the last night, I went to the emergency and remained there more than 24 hours. Don’t blame me, I just wanted to visit Portimão and stay another night in that luxurious hotel. Well the white wine had the same effect, 4 days before to go to USA I’ve made a little visit to the emergency. Then the doctors have decided for a surgical treatment.

I always though that problem was my weakness but today it is my strength. Many of you know that I’ve got a surgery 2 months ago (finally) but just a few knows what the problem was. It’s a fuck to can not eat, drink and… other stuff.

We were 4 people, 3 old men (around 60/70 years old) and me, a young woman. Usually it’s always first the ladies, but this time I was the last one. The nurses were always singing childish music to relax the patients. I was not afraid and seconds before the anesthesia I’ve asked to the nurses who was the doctor that will operate me. “Do you want to see him?!” she asked. “Yes, of course”, I’ve replied. The doctor came and looked to me without saying a word and I’ve said “Just do a good job; let the things pretty because I’m still a single woman.” I do not remember their reaction; I had no time to see it before to fall asleep.

I’ve woke up in the hell. A fat nurse told me “try to be calm, take deep breaths.” “I’m calm. Just give me something for the pains”, I said. “You are already medicated unless I put you in coma again!” she replied. The doctor arrived and she was explaining that I was to much agitate and didn’t know what to do to help me. At this time 2 guys approach to me, one injecting some stuff in my veins and the other one doing the same thing but in my ass. The doctor said to the nurse “No wonder why she is agitate, you do not want to do what she has done.”

The pains calm down but I’ve realized that I need to control a spasm. Until that day I didn’t know I had frequent spasms in such region. Each spasm took me back to hell. And you wonder how we control spasm… I don’t know, I’ve made the impossible to avoid them. I could not asleep at night with afraid of having a spasm. They took me to the bedroom where my mother was waiting for me. I really don’t want know what my mother saw into my eyes. She burst into tears. And yes… seeing her crying, I’ve cried too of weakness.

Today I’m fine, but I have not recovered yet. I’ve a fucking diet which is cereals at the breakfast, soup at lunch and soup at dinner, until the doctor changes his mind.

--------------"----------------"-----------

Today I’ve received a letter with no remitter. Funny… they have used the prefix Dr.a. Inside there was a CD with a single letter written on it… T.

“T?! I don’t believe… It can not be! Well, if it is what I’m thinking let see the show.” I’ve received a SMS saying “Have fun and laugh on watching it.”

I’ve watched the movies (some 80’s amateur tape). I did not laugh and I did not have fun. I’ve cried. I’ve replied to the SMS “I never done such things but I know what the pains are. The bastard should have a bullet in the brain.” I’ve taken about 30 minutes to stop crying and begin to write this message.

A special message for someone: “Do you understand why people were protecting me?!”

n.b. The sentence "The bastard should have a bullet in the brain." is a bad translation from the Portuguese sentence "O gajo merecia morrer com uma bala no meio da cornadura."

A Lunch Talk

2007-08-27T23:21:00.000+01:00

A lunch talk at my parent’s house:

Dad: It’s not because I’m old that I do not love your mother. I do not have your age, but I love my wife as in the old times.

Mom: Oh those old times, we were young and foul.

Sister: You were in love.

Mom: Love?! Passion?! Sorrow?! I do not know what I’ve felt at the beginning, we were both two kids alone, very poor and needed some emotional support.

My sister is younger than me, and she still has the fire of the youth on the skin. She answered with an angry voice:

Sister: SORROW?! It’s the worst you can feel for someone.

Me: Only who feels sorrow has a heart.

My sister looked at me completely astonished. I really don’t know if she has not understood what I’ve said or if she could not believe on what she has eared. My father realized the sudden change of her facial expression and said:

Dad: If your godmother did not felt sorrow, she would let the little cat dying in the street.

n.b. I’m the godmother of my sister and she treats me like it.

I Miss You

2007-08-23T15:52:00.001+01:00

Reward

2007-08-23T15:43:00.000+01:00

One of these past days, I was talking with a friend until to 2 a.m. We have talked about everything, and even I told the beautiful story of my arrival at USA. I’ve never written about that, but just to have an idea… I’ve slept with rats in a 3rd floor on my first night. Well, slept… I haven’t closed the eyes, I was scary. The house was located on the East zone of Cleveland, i.e., the worst and poorest zone of Cleveland.

Two days ago, the same friend asks:

- Do you want go to the movie?!

- Humm, why not?! I do not remember the last time I went to the movie. Which movie do you want to see?!

- Ratatouille.

- I hate that, sometimes my mother does ratatouille. I feel nauseas just smelling it.

And we went to the movie, to see Ratatouille. We have made a total of 120 Km (V.N.G) to see a movie with rats.

Next time I must to tell him pretty stories. Perhaps about the baby deer in the campus or the squirrels on my bedroom window.

6th Deadly Sin

2007-08-17T23:13:00.001+01:00

Envy is an emotion that "occurs when a person lacks another’s superior quality, achievement, or possession and desires it." They also feel that it is not possible (or not easy) for them to have what they want. Otherwise they would simply go get what the other person had, and they would be satisfied.

Envy is one of the Seven deadly sins.

At the core of envy seems to be an upward social comparison that threatens a person's self-esteem: another person has something that the envier considers to be important to have. A comparison is often rooted in the envier feeling low self-confidence, and they feel that they need to be or have the same things as others. If they don't have it, or they can't have it, they feel envy. This can be seen with money and power struggles.

However, what is envied could also be something that is only of personal importance to the envier, even if what the other person has is of little significance in his or her society, or even seen as a sign of inferior status. If the other person is perceived to be similar to the envier, the aroused envy will be particularly intense, because it signals to the envier that it just as well could have been him or her who had the desired object.

----------“---------------“------------

When I was a little girl my parents talked about envy. I always thought that happens in their generation but not in mine, because we (the young people) will change the world in a better place to live. Meanwhile I was growing up and I never felt that someone had envy about me. I knew that I had some disagreements with colleagues, but this is usual between young people, right?!

In life we adopt a certain life-style living, we have always some goals to achieve and we have believes. I always liked to have philosophical conversations; unfortunately it is rare to find the right personas to do it. Life teaches us to be wise, to talk when it is really necessary and if possible to be the last speaker. It was then that I felt the envy on my shoulders.

People always criticize your ideas, your believes, your belongings, your way of doing things, your work, everything. But never gives a better alternative for what they are criticizing. They always can give an option, but compared with yours it doesn’t worth to imagine how things will get work. People always like to be on the top, i.e., to know everything and more than you.

You can felt that with your relatives, with your friends (are they really friends?), co-workers or people passing by you. The funny of all of this is that they always try to make feel you as a dumb in front of everybody. The worst is trying to get your position at work or in society by trying to cause disagreements between you and other people. If you are not strong, you will perish.

It is frequent friends came to talk with me and the subject is envy. I always try to give them some comfort words and teach them how to react or how to solve some misunderstood created by some bastard. Sometimes I feel sorry for them. As what it concerns to me, quoting my father “neither a truck will move you, you are firm as a rock.” In other words who tries to knock me down, always ends with some broken bones.

Nobody is better than me, nobody is higher than me on anything, as I’m not better neither higher than nobody, unless you prove me that fact and I recognize it. And “to prove” is not “just talking” but “move your ass” to prove it.

How can I detect envious people?! It’s easy… The most common is the voice tone. You can always be very attentive to all the words of a sentence, a word not in the correct syntax position can give emphasis to something hidden. Very few people can recognize envious people by their smile and their look, a simple eyes contact of 1 second is enough.

Why people don’t get a life and let us live peacefully?!

It's a Question of...

2007-08-16T22:39:00.000+01:00

Because it's always a question of something, this music is dedicated to all of you.

Chorus:

Its a question of lust
Its a question of trust
Its a question of not letting
What we've built up
Crumble to dust
It is all of these things and more
That keep us together

It's a Question of Lust - Depeche Mode

Absent-Minded

2007-08-16T21:38:00.000+01:00

If you know me as well, you already know that I really bought a cowboy hat. Yesterday I was with a very old friend and we were talking about what kind of curtain rod I should put on my windows. Suddenly I’ve pick up the hat from the chair, put on my head and look to him very seriously (or laughing, I don’t remember).

- You should put a rod with one support in the middle… (I’ve put the hat) … with one (he was laughing), with one… (laughing uncontrollably).

Well, he doesn’t have finished his idea. I wonder what’s so funny about the hat.

UMinho connectivity

2007-08-10T23:07:00.000+01:00

Many of you knows that the connectivity to University of Minho have been shut down these last 2-3 days. It seems that some asshole while doing a cleft with a caterpillar machine has cut a cable of optic fiber. Why people do not take a map of wires and pipes that are underground to check if they can work safely or not?! Well… it was just a cable, right?!

The same asshole could break a pipe of water. It would be just a pipe of water, so why worry about that?! The same case as if it was a pipe of gas, right?! But in this example, somewhere the asshole should be assist to a detonation before dying. Why to get worried?! It would be just a pipe of gas.

That’s the Portuguese style of work: To do everything as soon as possible with minor effort and without a plan. Ok, sometimes is to do everything at the last minute and badly done (without a plan too).

Honestly, I can not understand these minds. People should work properly, safely and with determination. Instead of that people are incompetent, indulgent and lazy. At this point, I take a deep breath and I continue with my own life style.

Riding a Horse

2007-08-03T18:30:00.000+01:00

When I was a baby (4 months years old), says my father that we was shopping with my mother. They passed by the toys section and I’ve fixed my eyes on a swing plushy horse. They say that I could not remove my eyes from the horse. They could not afford it, but they bought the horse for me. The horse was so cute.

I remember to be 15 years old and studding for a psychology test, trying to learn by heart some cliché sentences and riding/swinging the horse. I would like to keep that horse forever, it was the most beautiful gift/toy that someone gave to me (and I do not remember that day, obviously).

When I was 20 years old my father had a serious conversation with me “Look, you need to give the horse to another kid. You are a grown up. You can not even sit on it.” I’ve agreed with him, but I would like to keep the horse for my children in the future. Anyway, I gave the horse to the church, so they could sell it on auction, reverting the funds to charitable causes. I could not turn my parent’s house into a warehouse.

I didn’t saw the auction. I could not saw it, otherwise I could buy the horse again for myself. I never saw anything similar, at least in Portugal.

Well, I’ve rode a horse for many years. Today I move myself in other ways, such as driving my car or… (And this one is for someone very special)

Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy

P.S. I really need to buy a cowboy hat.

Claustrophobia

2007-07-30T12:02:00.000+01:00

Claustrophobia: fear of being in enclosed spaces (by Cambridge Dictionaries Online).

What do they mean by 'space'?! Is it necessarily a physical space?

Yesterday I’ve wake up completely in the clouds… dreamy, smiling, loving, and everything that you can imagine when you feel that no matters what you’ll have a beautiful day. Suddenly I’ve received a message, it was most like an order, imposing me a schedule. Did I say that nothing could change my mood?! Ok, I was wrong.

Sometimes we must to attend some meetings, for social reasons. It’s always nice to have good social relationships. So… here we go. I’ve put a black dress and went to the meeting.

Do you know what is to pass all afternoon sited on a sofa, watching TV?! Fortunately I’ve took some crafts to do with me. I was always checking the time on the watch. Sometimes I’d look to my phone. Who knows?! Perhaps an unexpected meeting could take me out of such ‘space’. While we were talking, someone says “I wish you could stay here for the entire month.” I’ve swallowed dry often times and my mind was screaming “help me.”

I really hate when someone tries to govern my life. You can say “It was just a wish”. Well…No, it was not. I love so much my life as it is that I panic when I feel losing the control. And you ask “why to you think people tries to rule your life?” The answer is “I know my parents.”

At the end of the day, I’ve relaxed on my bed petting the cat sleeping on my tummy.

Forever Young - Alphaville

2007-07-24T14:35:00.000+01:00

That’s funny how our mood can change from a minute to another. I was reading some posts this morning and I have comment one of them. I’ve remembered the times where I had not work pressure, life pressure, problems to solve each day… It was if I lived on the wonderland.

Anyway, my comment was just:

*sigh*, I want to be young again!

And here it is the reply from my friend Nikos:

I Hate Chicken

2007-07-23T21:22:00.000+01:00

The question that you can do to me is “why do you hate chicken?” Well, do you have already eaten the same food for several days, weeks or months?! At the end, you can not even smell such food. Basically, you feel nauseas.

Here it is a story about chickens. This is the result of fidgeting the memories of our minds. It’s like the hat of a magician; we never know what will come out.

You already had some disagreements in real life or on the internet. In real life, you can observe the facial expression of each other, but not on the internet. Then, you can be very upset and on the internet you just gag the other side. Unfortunately, sometimes these disagreements extrapolate to real life.

One day a stupid chicken and a mad chicken had a virtual disagreement and they have established that such divergence will be solved in real life… fighting. I do not know what disagreement was, but I suppose that the stupid chicken has cackled too much, as usual. The fight would be on the next Saturday at 10 a.m. They would meet on the campus next to the fountain.

In that day, at that specific hour, there I was waiting for them.

Mad Chicken: What are you doing here?

Me: I came only to see if both of you will have a fair fight.

Stupid Chicken: Honey, this is men problem, you can not be here.

MC: For me that’s ok and it’s seems reasonable.

SC: This will not be nice to your pretty eyes.

Me: Shut up. So where will be the fight?

MC: Let’s go upstairs. Behind the gym there is enough space. They are building a parking car. Today is Saturday and nobody is there.

SC: That’s OK. Let’s go. But honey, I think is better for you to go home.

Me: Shut up and walk.

Well, arriving there, we must to jump a cleft on the ground with about 1.5 m wide and 2 m in depth. Some electric and communication pipes were being installed. The chickens have flied to the other side, while I was hesitant. I was afraid to fall. The chickens were laughing of me:

SC: Go back; the fight is not for ladies.

I’ve jumped. It was easier than I though. And there we were on the parking car. I’ve sited up on a wall, just in front of the gym.

MC: I do not have weapons.

SC: Neither me. I will fight only with my body.

MC: I wish you good luck.

SC: Thank you.

The chickens were prepared to wrestle each other when suddenly they have listened a “click” behind my backs. They have looked to me amazed, stupid like unbelievers.

Me: WHAT?!

MC: What do you have behind your backs?!

Me: Nothing.

SC: Hey darling, take it easy. Don’t do any foolishness.

Me: Who?! Me?! Both of you are going to kill each other, and it is me that I’m going to do something foolish?! Don’t make me laugh.

MC: Yes, but you said that you were here just to see the fight, and if the fight was fair for each one of us.

Me: That’s right. You both will fight, one will be down and the other one will be standing up, right?!

MC: Yes.

Me: So the one who will be standing up, will fight with me.

SC: You are going to hurt yourself.

Me: Shut up.

MC: Ok, but you have a weapon behind you.

Me: What’s the problem?! You can not handle a fight with a lady?! Are you expecting that a lady fights with a man without a weapon?! That will be unfair.

MC: I see your point, it’s quite fair.

Me: So, let’s the fight begins, gentlemen!

The two chickens look to each other. Who will be the first starting?! Suddenly:

SC: Look, we need to find a reasonable solution for this problem. I really don’t want to hurt you?!

Me: Who said that will be you fighting with me?! By the way, I was expecting to fight with your friend, and not with you.

MC: But I don’t want to beat you!!

Me: You will not beat on a woman, I know you enough. But you will be down, you can believe in me.

SC: Darling, be reasonable…

Me: But I’m the one being reasonable here. Both of you are fight for which reason?!

MC: Well…

SC: Men stuff.

MC: yes.

Me: Look, you had not afraid to face me once, had you?! So, why you have afraid now?!

MC: What?!

Me: Shut up.

SC: Ok, here it is the deal. We do not fight today. You are too upset with us.

Me: NO, You will fight today.

MC: Look, we can not fight and we need to put an end on this.

Me: I agree with you, what do you suggest?!

MC: Let’s go home. Tomorrow we’ll talk.

Me: Forget it… If you don’t want to fight, both of you need to shake your hands and never more try to have a fight for fun.

SC & MC: WHAT?!

Me: Do you have a better solution?! I do not have all day, you know?!

The chickens have shake their hands and apologized themselves.

MC: Now what?! What I’m going to tell to my friends?! They will ask me what has happened here.

Me: Just tell the truth!

SC: Are you crazy?! We can not say that we have been beaten by a lady?!

MC: Yes…

SC: That will be a dishonor for us.

Me: I don’t care. Say what you want. Now that you have apologized yourself, let’s go home.

Both have walked to home, and I was walking behind them. Sometimes both looked back to me, it was like the puppy dogs when they do something wrong. Somewhere they split away. The stupid chicken remained next to me and said:

SC: You have hurt my proud.

Me: It’s better to hurt your proud than to punch your nose.

And I went home. You are wondering why I have act in this way. I just can tell you that I was protecting myself.

What's new?!

2007-07-20T16:43:00.001+01:00

Morality Test

Results

You scored 40.5 out of a total of 44.

Your score puts you in the highest category of social reasoning. You will see ethical and moral values as important to the needs of society and will appeal to basic rights or values. You might say "Honesty is a standard which everyone should accept" or "Life is sacred."

Conformity to ethical norms is important to you, in terms of a responsibility, obligation or commitment for all individuals, although you may be willing to consider exceptions in some particular circumstances. You are likely to suggest that with entitlement or privilege comes responsibility.

You will appeal to considerations of responsible character or integrity in others, preferring a consistent or standard practice of behaviour in order to avoid damage to social institutions such as the legal system.

However, you will want to see an adjusted case-by-case application of standards for the sake of fairness to all people. Lastly, you are very likely to appeal to standards of individual or personal conscience, as well as of honour, dignity or integrity.

Good Looking?!

2007-07-19T20:34:00.000+01:00

Elephant: Why your boobies are on the back?!

Camel: Strange question from someone that has the dick on its face.

Thanks to Beccas.

Everybody Needs Friends

2007-07-19T12:47:00.001+01:00

Ascendent in Scorpio

2007-07-18T12:28:00.000+01:00

Scorpio Ascendant people have a lot of presence. There is something about them that tells the world that they are not to be pushed around. Their manner commands respect, and in some cases, fear. Scorpio rising people can be quiet or loud, but they always seem powerful and determined.

You either love or hate Scorpio rising people— they are rarely people who go through life unnoticed. In fact, some of them are confused when faced with the fact that they get such strong reactions from others. They seem to look right through people, seeing through superficiality. This can be quite intimidating to some, and intriguing to others. Scorpio rising people, in their dealings with others, look for answers by reading between the lines. Surface details are discarded when they are getting a feel for people and situations around them.

Scorpio rising people value their privacy so much, it can border on paranoia. They have a strong need to control their environment and are experts at strategy. Rarely people who will blow their chances with impatience, they plan out their moves carefully and deliberately, relying on their awesome ability to feel out others and situations.

Scorpio rising natives are drawn to down-to-earth, natural partners. Reliability in their partner is very important. They generally look for complete commitment and have little patience with flighty partners.

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Yes... You've got my point. Today it's not a good day to work, at least for me.

To Be an Aries

2007-07-18T11:41:00.000+01:00

Aries, take a bow. You're the first sign of the zodiac so it shouldn't come as any surprise then that you’re a born leader. You shine brightly, taking the initiative in everything you do and people see that in you immediately. There are no half-measures with you.

Remember the moon landing? Neil Armstrong was an Aries like you and the first to boldly go where no man had gone before. You have that same fearlessness and certainly aren't afraid to explore the unknown in life.

You’re lively, energetic and daring, and a fighter too. You crave adventure, and love to travel the world. You're a pioneer, and have the ability to lead. People admire your independence and freedom of expression in everything you do.

You could opt for work where you are your own boss, because you hate being told what to do. You know how to make your own decisions and create your own destiny. There might be plenty of stress in treading this path but at least it’s pressure on your own terms.

Achieving your goals is important to you. You know exactly what you want, and have no problem going after your goals. Your style is brisk, edgy and uncompromising. People who associate with you soon learn that they have to keep up — if they don’t, they'll soon fall by the wayside.

You have an instinctive understanding of what has to be done. There’s no procrastination in your manner- you hate laziness. You accept all experiences as a challenge, something to be jumped into with passion and excitement. It's all one big learning curve for an Aries.

You have ample confidence and self-assurance. These characteristics are at the heart of your nature and are among your greatest strengths. Just remember that sometimes this comes across as being overly assertive, perhaps even self-centred.

Your freedom-loving spirit means you like having space to get on with your work on your own terms. This can make it hard for you to be at your best in a team environment — some people misinterpret your energy and focus as insensitivity, even rudeness. You could try to make an effort, when you are working in a group, to let your co-workers see your unselfish and non-egotistical side.

You always prefer to get on with the job rather than to sitting around waiting for something to happen. This means that you are a little impatient with people who work at a slower pace. You can counteract this by remembering to relax and focus on some give and take — this will be an important challenge and life lesson for you.

You are impulsive yet will come up with all sorts of brilliant ideas. Occasionally however, you will occasionally get things wrong, too. Luckily, you aren’t afraid of making mistakes and learning your life lessons the hard way. (There’s Aries' fearlessness kicking in again!)

All these traits that reflect tons of energy, enthusiasm and confidence but you are also misunderstood by others. Some will say you are tactless and indifferent when they offer you advice. From your point of view, it’s a matter of remembering that not everyone is as quick-witted and capable as you; just be aware that you need to be gentle and patient when dealing with weakness or slowness in others.

It would be a good idea to pay more attention to detail, rather than just focusing on the big picture, which is what you instinctively do — this would help bring out your talents.

Try to accommodate the different types of people you have to deal with. If you can learn to balance your patience and sensitivity with your courage and determination, you will discover your life can be magically transformed and spiritualised.

In this life you are destined to take on a leadership position. Remember, that while you are tackling your responsibilities, you are also setting an example for others.

If you can tap into the gentler and cooler side of your character, it will temper your passion and energy superbly, and you will be much loved and looked up to by family, friends and work associates.

If you were born between 21 and 30 March, the planet Mars will be doubly strong for you. It rules your fortune and destiny. You can be very demanding, and not so good at tolerating opposition in any form — you will make those of different views from yours prove their case. You are the Ghengis Khan of the Aries clan.

This increased Martian energy gives you lots of oomph and physical stamina. You need to get involved with as much physical activity as possible to release your frustration.

If you were born between 31 March and 10 April, it makes you a proud and extremely loyal person. You also have traces of the other fire sign, Leo, in your make-up. You’re one of the brighter fireflies in the Aries camp and attract people very easily.

You also impose your will on others, almost magically, without their opposition. Your lesson in life is to learn how to use your powers responsibly.

My favourite part:

Being born between 11 and 19 April means you are endowed with greater humanitarian characteristics, which means you have gentler and added charitable motivations behind your actions.

You run the risk of occasionally pushing yourself harder than your body and mind can handle. You mean well, but in the heat of the moment you say and do things you later regret. You’re a lucky person, though, because Jupiter’s beneficial rays promise protection. Many fascinating opportunities are destined to come your way.

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I do not want to hurt anybody but we (aries) are the best. :-p

Obsession

2007-07-16T16:55:00.000+01:00

Last month I have attended an international conference at Porto. As usual, at lunch time, all the participants try to socialize. And there I was doing the same. I was talking with a guy coming from Netherlands. I do not remember to much of the conversation, but some minutes before a plenary session he said:

Netherland Guy: 4 days of conference is too much!!

me: Yes it is. About 5 days that I didn't go to my office. I miss so much my office that last night I went there.

NG: No, I can not believe it.

me: Yes, it’s true. I was there since 10 p.m. until midnight. Just checking e-mails, nothing important.

NG: I think you need a doctor.

me: I think so… and you?! Are you enjoying your stay in Portugal?! Everybody complains about the weather, but believe me… the weather is just fine, it’s not cold neither too hot.

NG: I would like to have this weather where I live. In fact I’m in holidays.

me: Oh, you have toke some days off while attending the conference.

NG: No, I’m in holidays. Last week I saw somewhere that a conference about numerical simulations will be held here. And here I am. I do not know what I’m going to answer if my boss asks how good were my holidays. I think I’ll answer that I’ve attended a conference.

me: Hummm, he will think that has an excellent employee. Anyway, you really need a doctor too.

NG: I agree with you.

Adam & Eve at Saudi Arabia

2007-07-15T00:00:00.000+01:00

Stolen from Nikos's pictures.

Videogames Improve Vision by Rewiring Your Brain

2007-07-13T21:04:00.001+01:00

You can see the original message here.

A Story With About 12 Years Old

2007-07-12T18:25:00.000+01:00

A good thing is to remember some situation on the past and laugh of it. One of these days I was talking with a friend when suddenly she said:

- Do you remember that time you were cooking pizza?! And your guy was saying “put some more corn, more corn…”. I never ate pizza with corn until that day.

- Yes, all the guys liked corn, so I’ve exaggerated on such ingredient.

- And do you remember after the dinner… we saw a movie where the girl used honey to cover the body guy. I do not remember the name of the movie.

- The title was “4 days and 5 nights”. The guy had decided to have an affair one week before the wedding.

- I don’t know.

- Ooh, but I know!

I went to the movie store with two of the guys. They would like to watch a movie with some “hard core” scenes. I’ve just remembered them the last time I tried to see such movie, I’ve blow up all the dinner. They gave me free pass to choose the movie. So I choose an erotic movie. Instead to watch hard core scenes we saw some sensual scenes. One of the guys said:

- With such movie, it is not fair to have only one woman with us.

- Oh, don’t worry, I’ll call to a friend of mine – said the other one.

At night when she has arrived, I was cooking pizza. I really don’t know how many pizzas I’ve cooked, perhaps 4 or 5… but each one were extra big size. One thing that I never liked is someone messing me while I’m cooking: “do this”, “put that”, “watch out”, etc. Come on… If I’d willing myself to cook, it’s because I know how to cook. Anyway… we had dinner and after we went to our bedroom to watch the movie. I never had so many people on the bed. We were 4 guys and 2 girls. Of course, two of the guys remained sited on a chair, because there was no space for everybody.

Something that I’ve appreciate was seeing the face of the guys on some erotic scenes. I wonder why I always loved to cause some dry swallowing to the guys. Unfortunately we could not saw some hot scenes. The video tape was to damage on that specific location. The guys have decided to replay these scenes on the relent mode. On one of the scenes, the woman covered the body of the men with honey. The man was attached to a post and could not move. He was to the mercy of that woman. She has massaged his body with honey and licked some honey for all over his body (or should I say “licked his body with honey”?). Suddenly the video tape was acceptable and… the maid arrived at home. It was morning. The maid saw her boss attached to a post, completely naked and dirty with honey and other sweet creamy food. Her boss…!!

That was what my friend remembers. I really don’t know why she remembers that night… perhaps because she was flirting one of the cute guys?! Anyway, I will never forget that night but for another reason. In the next day, I’ve ate honey for the last time on my life.

The idea was funny but in reality it was quite sticky. Try to imagine two people on the bathroom washing and itching themselves, after to have eaten an half of honey bottle of 500ml. When I remember this I usually say that I could not have a better nutritional breakfast as that one.

For those who planes to do such thing, try to use some body oil with a sweet fragrance instead to use some food. You really don’t want to scratch yourself during hours. That’s an advice.

All the video tapes have a few seconds showing a message “do not copy this video”. In my opinion, some video tapes should also present the message DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME.

After this message, I'm sure she will tell me again thousand times that I'm crazy. Ok, let's turn off the MSN. :-)

Wokini

2007-07-12T18:14:00.000+01:00

A long time ago, I've purchased this book just because I like to have all the books of a specific author. But... reading it, it was a beautiful surprise.

Wokini: A Lakota Journey to Happiness and Self-Understanding by Billy Mills & Nicholas Sparks

About the book

This is a parable of a young man's spiritual quest begins with death and moves toward life. When his favorite sister dies, the grieving young Lakota, David, is given a mysterious scroll by his father. Through visionary teachings, David learns how to move past his pain and into happiness.

Wokini, translated from Lakota, means seeing a new beginning or seeking a new vision. This book will teach you about yourself, show you what it means to be happy and lead you on a journey to feel more satisfied in your life.

Brief synopsis of a single chapter

10 rules to light the flame of the happiness:

1- Convince yourself that you are the most special human being on the earth.

2- Be grateful for everything that life gives to you.

3- Face up your life with optimism and have hope on the future.

4- Set up new interesting goals on your life.

5- Live each day of your life as if it was the last one.

6- Adjust yourself to life as it comes.

7- Learn to live with yourself and love yourself.

8- Never be a perfectionist.

9- Learn to laugh of your life.

10- Accept the opinions different from yours.

Afraid?!

2007-07-08T19:32:00.000+01:00

Today I went to my mother’s house... to visit the dog. The dog is a Doberman (named King) with all most 7 years old. He had a surgery this past Thursday. The right back leg was removed, he had a bone cancer. It's quite choking to see King without a leg.

Well... I have decided to take Mr. Vain with me. Some fresh air from the country will be good for him. I've put the cat on a travel bag and... Here we go.

On the way, I have noticed a bad smell; I thought the cat was flatulent. WRONG... I had a piece of shit on the bag. Ok, the cat has his needs, it was just an accident. I've just washed everything. When coming back, the smell was stronger. STUPID CAT, another piece of shit of the bag, but this time it was more liquid. Again I've washed everything. The cat is at the verandah and he will not enter in the house while he does not wash itself completely.

I have a cat which has afraid to travel in a car. Huumm, I'm thinking on change his name to Mr. Cagones.

Woman To Woman

2007-07-06T22:11:00.000+01:00

Strange, funny and intriguing is at I see some recent talks with my mother. After to surpass the barrier of the thirties; my mother is talking to me as a woman and not as a mother. Some secrets are revealed from her side and from mine. The subjects are always the same: love, passion, desire, sex, ambition, dreams. To be honest, I've never expected to ear my mother talking about some subjects and… that woman is a real woman, she has my admiration.

Today the talk was about love and passion, but she was only inquiring and listening. Her conclusion was “definitively, the times are changed. Nothing is similar to my old times”. Indeed… I agree with her.

And here it is my mood today,

Listen To Your Heart - Roxette