What People Should Not Say

This last month I’ve eared some unfortunate words. Honestly, I wonder if people have the common sense developed. Here are some words of what I can remember:

(twice from colleagues)

- Was it an accident?!

- Do you think it was an accident with 32 years old? I never had an accident before so why it could be an accident now?!

(from my boss)

- huh, I do not know if I must give you the congratulations.

- You can give them, I don’t mind.

(from a doctor)

- Yes… he can come in, he must be the father right?

I thought: no, no, it’s my neighbor.

(from a colleague)

- And how are you going?

- Fine, but worried with some incontinence when I sneeze, cough, vomit. I must carry clean pants in my purse.

- Oh, so cute.

- I do not see what is cute in this scenario.

- Oh, so it is something serious.

- Not at all, the doctor said this is usual.

(from a colleague)

- You are becoming so fat, so round…

- Thank you. By the way, I’m pregnant.

Negative Minds

In life, all of us have met or will meet someone who has always an opposite opinion from yours. I mean… If you say yes he/she will say no. If you agree he/she will disagree, and so on. Of course, you do not see or talk with such people everyday. But many times you can denote stubbornness on those people; they just want to be different from you and better than you. Many times those people are just “unbelievable” on invoking ridicules arguments to justify their opinions.

Now, imagine you are making a suggestion or asking something to someone and you got a reply like these ones:

Monday	I do NOT like…
Tuesday	I do NOT want…
Wednesday	I do NOT go…
Thursday	I did NOT knew…
Friday	I did NOT noticed…
Saturday	I did NOT paid attention…
Sunday	I did NOT made…
February 30th	I did NOT saw...

Try to imagine to listen those sentences everyday, even at night in your dreams (That would be a curse). And try to imagine the same person saying those sentences (That would be what?! A hell?!). Some of you are just wondering “Why do you not buy a shotgun?” Humm… what a terrific idea.

Well, a lesson must be taken from this story. We must learn to say NO too, whatever it costs. Let's try to be different and enjoy the negativism of life.

Another [M]nat[h]'s Theory

On the phone, when you are hanging on, listening some classical music during several minutes... The time of waiting is proporcional to the necessity to go to bathroom.

[M]nat[h] Theory

The number of times that we check on-line the bank accounts is inversely proportional to the capital amount available on them.

Today I cried

Since my 15 years old that I have (or had) a health problem. I’ve got used and lived with it until today. On each year passing the quality of life had always an exponential decrease. Soon I had a restricted diet, but you know better than nobody that sometimes we break the diet. It’s not easy to go to a restaurant and do not know what to eat. I’ve always avoid the weird names on the menu and sometimes I asked to the waiter which specific condiments the food had.

There was times that I didn’t knew that I will got ill. I remember the day I’ve started the master degree. My mother has made a delicious soup with white beans for diner. White beans… Today I run away from them as the devil runs away from the cross. Another memorable day, a MOO dinner (the last dinner, not lunch), while socializing I’ve drunk a vodka. Vodka… I’ve passed around 10 hours in the hospital in the next day. While attending the SofExtrusion 2004 at Algarve, I’ve drunk some red wine while I was dinning with my boss. We were in the Pestana Hotel (5 *) at Alvor. 5 days of conference it was like 5 days of nightmares. In the last night, I went to the emergency and remained there more than 24 hours. Don’t blame me, I just wanted to visit Portimão and stay another night in that luxurious hotel. Well the white wine had the same effect, 4 days before to go to USA I’ve made a little visit to the emergency. Then the doctors have decided for a surgical treatment.

I always though that problem was my weakness but today it is my strength. Many of you know that I’ve got a surgery 2 months ago (finally) but just a few knows what the problem was. It’s a fuck to can not eat, drink and… other stuff.

We were 4 people, 3 old men (around 60/70 years old) and me, a young woman. Usually it’s always first the ladies, but this time I was the last one. The nurses were always singing childish music to relax the patients. I was not afraid and seconds before the anesthesia I’ve asked to the nurses who was the doctor that will operate me. “Do you want to see him?!” she asked. “Yes, of course”, I’ve replied. The doctor came and looked to me without saying a word and I’ve said “Just do a good job; let the things pretty because I’m still a single woman.” I do not remember their reaction; I had no time to see it before to fall asleep.

I’ve woke up in the hell. A fat nurse told me “try to be calm, take deep breaths.” “I’m calm. Just give me something for the pains”, I said. “You are already medicated unless I put you in coma again!” she replied. The doctor arrived and she was explaining that I was to much agitate and didn’t know what to do to help me. At this time 2 guys approach to me, one injecting some stuff in my veins and the other one doing the same thing but in my ass. The doctor said to the nurse “No wonder why she is agitate, you do not want to do what she has done.”

The pains calm down but I’ve realized that I need to control a spasm. Until that day I didn’t know I had frequent spasms in such region. Each spasm took me back to hell. And you wonder how we control spasm… I don’t know, I’ve made the impossible to avoid them. I could not asleep at night with afraid of having a spasm. They took me to the bedroom where my mother was waiting for me. I really don’t want know what my mother saw into my eyes. She burst into tears. And yes… seeing her crying, I’ve cried too of weakness.

Today I’m fine, but I have not recovered yet. I’ve a fucking diet which is cereals at the breakfast, soup at lunch and soup at dinner, until the doctor changes his mind.

--------------"----------------"-----------

Today I’ve received a letter with no remitter. Funny… they have used the prefix Dr.a. Inside there was a CD with a single letter written on it… T.

“T?! I don’t believe… It can not be! Well, if it is what I’m thinking let see the show.” I’ve received a SMS saying “Have fun and laugh on watching it.”

I’ve watched the movies (some 80’s amateur tape). I did not laugh and I did not have fun. I’ve cried. I’ve replied to the SMS “I never done such things but I know what the pains are. The bastard should have a bullet in the brain.” I’ve taken about 30 minutes to stop crying and begin to write this message.

A special message for someone: “Do you understand why people were protecting me?!”

n.b. The sentence "The bastard should have a bullet in the brain." is a bad translation from the Portuguese sentence "O gajo merecia morrer com uma bala no meio da cornadura."

A Lunch Talk

A lunch talk at my parent’s house:

Dad: It’s not because I’m old that I do not love your mother. I do not have your age, but I love my wife as in the old times.

Mom: Oh those old times, we were young and foul.

Sister: You were in love.

Mom: Love?! Passion?! Sorrow?! I do not know what I’ve felt at the beginning, we were both two kids alone, very poor and needed some emotional support.

My sister is younger than me, and she still has the fire of the youth on the skin. She answered with an angry voice:

Sister: SORROW?! It’s the worst you can feel for someone.

Me: Only who feels sorrow has a heart.

My sister looked at me completely astonished. I really don’t know if she has not understood what I’ve said or if she could not believe on what she has eared. My father realized the sudden change of her facial expression and said:

Dad: If your godmother did not felt sorrow, she would let the little cat dying in the street.

n.b. I’m the godmother of my sister and she treats me like it.

Men

Since a few weeks I’m thinking on writing something about… women, but… let’s talk about men, just because I had a talk with a friend last Thursday night. Well, I was there listening, not talking too much. Apparently, it has happened to her the same shit/thing as me.

We were talking about men, how men respect themselves and how women are respected by men. A man can be the worst of the worst, but just because he is a geeky on a certain area, the other men consider him as if he was God. In fact, there are plenty of geeks that are basically assholes. On the opposite, a man that is not a geek on any special area, but it’s a great man in life; usually it is considered by men a specimen with no value. Funny… a woman will prefer the great man rather than a geek. [It is not my opinion; it is the general women opinion].

Let’s look to the women. A woman is always respected by men if she has a geeky boyfriend, but will be an asshole if she got married with a geek. Every men think “How could she married him, I’m better than her stupid husband.” Men generally are pretty rude with single woman that does not have any geeky boyfriend. It is quite curious… after get married; the same men look to the woman and think “I’m so stupid, she got better than myself.”

Here are some questions for some men:

1st: Why men respect themselves by their knowledge (or not) and respect women by their ‘males’?

2nd: Why men respects the geeky funny guys instead the worker serious guys?

We could not get the answer. But we agree that both had jerk men in our lives; and we know a bundle of stupid jerks. Looking back to the past we wonder about the reason to get so close of so stupid jerk geeks.

It’s great to have been talking with her. At least I’m not the only one that felt trapped by jerks.