A Far West Story

Today I’ll tell another story… a story full of stupidity (or should I say macho stupidity?!)

The story began in November 2005. I was in USA, when one day I’ve called mum. I’ve denoted a strange voice and I’ve insisted on knew what’s going on. Mum told me “A bastard has stolen the plot of land, sliced by the road.” Just to explain, we have one hectare of land. In August 2005 we let a road passing along it to benefit and raise the value of it. In fact, in a corner, the road has sliced the field. About 100m^2 were separated from the big amount of land. Well, it is nothing, but if someday I decide to divide the hectare into lots, that 100m^2 of land can give a small parking car. In fact, next to the slice of land is passing by a brook. The neighbor in the other side of the brook has decided to make 2 bridges connecting his two small farms with the road. Of course, he has passed over the sliced field, knocking down the trees remained there for decades.

I’ve asked to mum why she didn’t stop the guy but she has replied to me that the guy said in the presence of the police officers “Move away or I’ll pass the digger over you.”

I was so far away, and so pissed off. I really doubt that the guy would make any bridge if my father or I was there. The bastard has stolen land from us, threaten my mother and… continuing with the story…

I told to mum to talk with a lawyer and to prosecute the bastard for a) robbery; b) property invasion; c) property damages; d) threat to her physical integrity. She is stubborn, but this time she has made everything as I was telling her. My father was pissed off too. He does not tolerate such disrespect to his wife. My father is crazy enough to do something foolish, so it was not easy to calm him down.

August 2006 I’ve decided which flat to buy. One day, I was so tired that I went to bed in the afternoon. It was 17.30 when I've received a phone call from mum, completely desperate saying “I need your help, come here quickly. The bastard has attempted to kill your father.” Ok, then I was really, really pissed off. You do not want to know what I was intending to do in the next 10 minutes after the phone call. I went there. At my arrival the police officers were there making measurements and asking some questions to the witnesses. So what’s happened?! My parents went to the farm and in that specific moment the bastard was in his farm. My father went until the bridge and remained on his side. He was intending to have a serious talk, man to man, with the bastard. The bastard enters on his pick-up, passes over the bridge in direction to my father. My father had time only to jump to the brook, but not without a push from the pick-up on his backs. From the police officers measurements, the pick-up was in the opposite sense of the road and passed with the front tire from the bridge side about 10 cm. Later he said to the police officer that it was not his intension to run over my father.

I went with my father to the emergency and remained there for several hours. He had a fissure on his low spine. In the emergency service everybody was astonished with such story. One of the doctors said “Are we in the far west land, or what?!” It was 2 a.m. when I went to the police office with my father to prosecute the bastard for e) killing attempt. I remember my father was tired and confused. My father has answered all the questions made by the police officer, but it was me that I was insisting on prosecute the guy. The police officer was always saying “This is a disagreement between neighbors, the case will be closed”. After 2 hours of nonsense conversation I become angry and said “You will accept our charge and gladly, otherwise tomorrow morning I’ll be here to talk with your superiors. As you have told, you should be at home with your wife and your kids since about 2 hours ago. So if you really love them, you will not take the risk to be dismissed or to be regressed.” End of the story, the guy has made the prosecution, my father has signed the papers and we went home to rest. This story is so serious that PJ (Policia Judiciária) is in charge for the case.

This week my mum said “The bastard is demolishing the bridges”, finally after 2 years, but today she told me “He has only destroyed one; tomorrow I’ll go to the town council to charge him again.” All of us are beginning to see some light at the end of the tunnel... Two f*cking years to compel the bastard to demolish the bridges!! Now, we just need to sit down and watch the decay of the bastard, on paying the court costs and the compensations for all the prosecutions, specially the prosecution e).

By the way, today (September, 26) my parents celebrate their 37th marriage anniversary. Congratulation to both of them.